Show me your shell, and I will judge you.

What if we were all the same; the shell that contains our soul was the same to the judging eye.
The first impression - would be what?
The scent. The voice. And then perhaps the actual contents of what we have to say.

And you wonder - all those people dealing with daily insecurities because of their bodily flaws according to our sick standards in society - would they blossom, when they no longer struggled with their imperfections?
Would they find inner peace, if there no longer was anyone condemning them for their visible shortcomings?
Would we in fact be flawless if we no longer strived for external perfection.

Sometimes I wonder: What if we left all judgement to God where it belongs.
What if we stopped pretending that we have the answer.
What if we stopped lying. Playing games. With others and ourselves. Games of deceit.
Would we all win then?
The thing we want the most - to win. Would we win back life if we stopped playing the game.

What would this world be like.
If we all were naked - emotionally and in the same skin.

Would we dare more, evolve more as humans, connect with our inner call, because the outside was out of our control and mattered not?

Victoria Beckham eats like a horse.

Must be all that grass. Goes straight to your ass.
Or not.

Yes I'll believe it, if that entails grass and more grass, that is.

Now the pressure of looking skinny and yet not coming across as "a-neurotic-nutcase" is so intensified that a new term has been invented for celebrities eating junk food in public in order to portray a relaxed image (while lunching in their "its-laidback-Sunday" Manolos and "casual" Valentino waist-nippig sundresses): Documented Instance of Public Eating (DIPE by Hollywood publicists).
How endearing indeed.

Get the full yadayada here.

That's a beautiful can...

(Remember to turn off the music player at the bottom of the right sidebar, before watching this clip)


Does this make you want to drink Pepsi?
That car. 
That stare. 
That hair.
...Heck yeah!

This is such a classic - and I adore Cindy, as she has that timeless class and confidence about her.
The power of her is so strong that whatever she does, you want to do it too. And don't give me that "Not me! I'm above emotional manipulation!" Darling, you are tricking yourself. No one is above being driven by their emotions; it's all about whether we are conscious of the game or not.
That can is going to be in your hand next time you grab something from the minibar. Although, it's not going to satisfy your thirst for passion...

Use the power of emotions to add passion to whatever you value in life. Passion is what draws people in. Passion is what makes people copy you and your actions. And that is ultimately the goal in life: To do something worth having others copy.

Never forget the power of action vs. empty words. People do what they see you doing, not what you say. Whether it comes from a can or you're on a quest to save the planet.

Choose your passion and others will follow. Passion leads to fatal attraction.

Attention Whore. Are You?

I have this friend who smiles. Like, a lot.

Marilyn knew the power of emotional pornography: 
Make people THINK you like them.
Unfortunately, faking your feelings and manipulating others 
do not lead to happiness;
she ended up the mistress and ending her miseries in an overdose. 
With a smile, I am sure.

I have often wondered why it is that she smiles at every joe that passes her way? It is certainly not based on her finding them attractive, more often than not she admits to finding them repulsive.
What drives these fake smiles, is that she so desperately wants to be liked. It has nothing to do with whether she likes someone or not. She just wants them to like her. And they do; or rather they like the fact that someone likes them (...). Both driven by vanity and insecurity they suffocate each other in smiles, niceties and hollow flattery only because they crave the attention, the affirmation that they are worthy of the attention. The only reason they compliment is to hear it back, the only reason why they smile, is to be smiled back at, the only reason they stay is to receive flattery. Words so empty and without meaning.
Their being nice is actually an act based on selfishness. NOT that there is anything wrong with being nice. You might as well add some hope to a world drowning in pain, and in many cases something like just being there, being present means everything. But motive is everything. You cannot hide your vain ego behind a shallow smile and old lines.
And there is nothing more distasteful than to witness someone lying through their teeth out of vanity.

And that is why I so firmly believe that the first step to getting the body of your dreams and gaining attractiveness, is to FEEL great in your own skin. Because a great body will follow.
And everyone deserves to feel comfortable in this skin.

Monopolizing misery.

Meet client A: She is  21, comes from a wholesome family, tall and slender, has a loving and handsome boyfriend and her dad’s credit card in her pocket. And yet she cries herself to sleep every night, covers the mirrors in self-hatred and does coke on the weekends. She has no deep traumas. Spoiled brat, is she?

Meet client B: She is 23, sexually abused by her dad since her mother died when she was in her early teens. Everyone can understand that she cuts herself to distract herself from the emotional pain, prefers vodka over water and can’t hold a job (...).

Question: Who has the right to pain of the two? 

Answer: Both. Pain is in perception. Life hurts. Everyone cries. And they both hurt equally much. It is not what you go through in life, but how you deal with it.

Everyone has the right to pain, ironically people somehow tend to compete in that area, addicted to misery and yearning for pity: Demanding the right to misery, insisting that certainly their situation is unique; their life is so much tougher than anyone else’s (...)

If there is one thing I have learnt in life, it is that everybody hurts sometimes. No one hurts more than others. And yet it seems that there is this competition going on “who has it tougher”. I don’t get it: Aren’t we supposed to change what we don’t like in life, instead of continue being in a situation that cause us to complain day in and day out.

Isn’t insanity defined by the very act of doing the same thing over and over again, yet expecting a different outcome...?

If so, insanity is the new normalcy. 

And that is just plain sad. It is certainly nothing to brag about.

Animals know pain, but no self-pity.

If you don’t like the cards you have been dealt, then play a different game.

Why continue to play a game that you hate? That makes no sense.

Only humans tend to be addicted to misery and demand pity. It is an incredibly selfish act, this trying to manipulate others via emotional pornography. Everyone deserves empathy and love, but using emotions to manipulate is pure selfishness.

I have never seen an animal feel sorry for itself. They take the hits, and then they move on. Kittens tumble and fall, and their mothers watch from a distance, ensuring that they can handle the hit, but don’t intervene unless a matter of life and death. They learn from an early age that “hey, life hurts, and it’s going to kick you til you lie down, so you might as well learn to protect yourself, lick your wounds, and then get back up”. Even when animals die, do they demand pity and cry? No, they carry themselves with pride, and bundle up to die. That is life. Death is a natural part of life. And if one has faith in God, then death is not the end.

Pain is universal, it’s not a competition about who hurts the most - because everyone hurts. It is about finding a solution and healing the scars: Everyone deserves to be loved. And oftentimes those who cry in silence need it more than those who open the watergates in public in a vain attempt to gain pity and attention.


If you need help to redesign your life, contact your Life Stylist - we can help you out of misery. We understand the biochemical and emotional complexities when changing your life, whether you a struggling with an addiction due to an imbalanced brain chemistry or stuck in self-destructive black/white addictive thinking causing fear and anxiety to take up your focus.

How Much Does Happiness Cost...?

NB: Turn off the music in the right sidebar, before watching this clip.

This video for Calvin Klein Collections Spring 2011 intrigues me. 

What are they selling here? Emotions. The search for perfection... bliss... timelessness... eternal youth... love.... beauty.... all our basic needs will be met if we buy this product. That is, only if we have empty, shallow lives will we be tempted to give in to this kind of emotional pornography.

If you have found what is already within you... a sense of peace... calmness... the ability to taste a ripe fig... savoring the flavors.... watching the sun while it sets in the horizon.... being mesmerized by how the leaves change with the season. Just being able to be.... then you won't need what they are falsely selling here. Because what you need... everything is in you already... you have the power to change... a different life... one that is full and rich is within your grasp... waiting for you to take that first step....

You are not alone. Others have gone before you. Pain is universal, but you can turn your pain into beauty, wisdom and knowledge... but you have to take that first step to let go of self-destructive behaviors.

We can help you.

Contact us today.