Amy Winehouse: Another one bites the dust.

Only 27 and today she was found dead in her London apartment.

Amy Winehouse has been struggling with drug, alcohol and food addiction for years; a deadly combination that sooner or later will lead to cardiac arrest. Ultimately, a lot of eating disorders and addictions cause heart attacks - which is then noted down as the primary death cause. But whenever someone below 50 years of age dies from a sudden heart attack, you have to look into their lifestyle more thoroughly - few young people have a weak heart, if not abusing some sort of substance or suffering from eating disorders; so many deaths are being misinterpreted and thus the statistics of how many young people actually die from their addictive behaviors are still in the gray zone.
Amy Winehouse is scheduled for autopsy tomorrow.

Amy Winehouse dead by 27. Killed by addiction.

If only she had known that the reason why she could not cut the chains of addiction by sheer willpower is due to severe brain chemical imbalances; and if those are not addressed via nutrient and amino acid therapy, every stint in rehab is doomed to fail, as she will constantly have the urge to self-medicate on drugs/alcohol to stabilize her mood temporarily.

For more info on how to rebalance brain chemical imbalances and how we can help you if you are struggling with an addiction contact us.

Source:

http://www.newser.com/story/124136/amy-winehouse-dead-at-27-found-in-her-apartment.html

Don't turn around (I heard her say).

In New York you do a lot of people watching. And people bumping. And something that rhymes on bumping. And people cursing. And people pleasing. And people hating. Just because there are people everywhere.
And a great place to watch people is in the metro. And it struck me: How many traces of bitterness on the faces... sitting there everywhere.
Bitterness is such an odd, unfamiliar feeling to me... it seems like such a waste of time, emotion and suffering to use on bitterness. Because nothing good ever comes from bitterness - it is like a dark shadow that sneaks up on you and suffocates you; while you try to drag everyone around you down with you.
And what is the point in that? That way everyone suffers and the only thing that is certain is that nothing constructive will arise from that feeling.

Yet it seems as if this is one of the top 5 most common feelings that humans allow into their life.
I was talking with a friend of mine whom had just been dumped. And she was extremely bitter. While it is understandable that it is painful; it's life. It has nothing to do with her per se. It does not make her of any lesser value. They were just not the right match, and perhaps he just realized it before she did. And so you move on. You cry. You accept it. And move on. No regrets, because there was a time where that may have been exactly what you were looking for - at that time, at that place in your life. It may have helped you develop some skills. However, things change, and you must be flexible to adapt. Don't look back.

And then I thought to myself, how come I don't feel bitter when people hurt me? Because I definitely feel hurt. And as most of Italian descent, I can get very angry a bit quick at times. But that's it - it never turns into bitterness. But that is only because whenever I have tried to suppress my anger, I notice right away that it turns into resentment - and that is one emotion that I can't afford in my life, because I simply cannot be creative and passionate, if I allow this feeling into my life. It is like giving up control of your life and accepting victimization. Thus, I must confront whatever the issue is that causes me to feel anger, before it turns into something toxic.

You have to first understand what initially triggers this feeling to prevent it from penetrating your life.

Typically you will get angry - and anger always occurs when we fear losing something - whether it be our ego or a physical thing. We can then either choose to deal with that anger and handle that conflict and move on; not turning back. Or, we can suppress our anger and avoid confronting the conflict.
This is where all of our internal alarm clocks should go off: Because this leads to a slow build-up of negative, unresolved emotions within us. What we resist, persists. So we become resentful. And as time goes by that resentment evolves into bitterness... and bitterness is very difficult to get out of your life once you have allowed that chain-reaction of thoughts and feelings to take place and infect your life.

Identifying your triggers in life and learning to deal with anger, instead of suppressing your feelings and letting it eat you up from inside, sets you free emotionally.

Cry. Scream. Yell if you must. Get it out of your system - find you coping mechanism.
But don't turn around. No regrets.

Andy Irons: Autopsy confirms surf legend died of drugs

Irons was definitely my favorite surfer. He was everything every surfer wanted to be. Intense, talented, ripped abs and passionate. Irons was a legend in the surf.

Unfortunately he was not only addicted to fun, but succumbed to drugs in search of peace with his inner demons.

Irons came off as a very intense human being. I believe you need to be intense to be talented... Intensely driven to find your passion; meaning in life. To follow your call, never give up, always rise when you fall - like a cat you lick your wounds and then get back up.

When you are passionate you tend to connect with your senses. You have a hunger for more that yearns to be satisfied. You hunger for the flavors of life... but if you eat too many bitter flavors, it leaves you sick.

Intensity without balance is a one-way ticket to self-destruction.

Turn off the music at the bottom of the right side bar before watching this clip.


Reference:

http://www.tmz.com/2011/06/10/andy-irons-surfer-death-dallas-texas-medical-examiner-report-heart-disesase-cocaine-methadone/

In Search of. Freedom.

Are you free?

Do you even know what it means to be free...

It is that feeling, when you wake up in the morning with the sunlight streaming down on your face and you breathe... you hear the birds chirping outside. For no particular reason do they sing; they are just happy to be.

It is that feeling, when you run barefoot along the sand, running through the white foam as the waves break on the beach.

It is that feeling, when you curl up in the window and watch life from far below, mesmerized by the pace.

It is that feeling when you walk deep beneath the oak trees and only hear the breaking of branches beneath you.

It is that feeling, when nothing matters yet everything does.

It is when everything just is, when you judge nothing - life flows and blows through you like the summer breeze caressing your skin.

You have everything you need. You are carefree and yet you care.

Life matters yet your worries are insignificant in the grande scheme of life.

That is freedom.

That is happiness.

And that is what every human aims for in life.

Freedom is when you let go of the chains of your past.
Freedom is when you judge nothing, and you let no one judge you.
Freedom is holding on to nothing, owning nothing.
Freedom is being in that very moment.

Free of the chains of your past.

You just decide to let go. 

Nothing can harm you but your own thoughts and fears.

No one has the power to chain you, except you.

And you are free to be whatever you want to be. Whenever you want to be.

You just make that decision; that NOW is the time. This time is forever.

That life changing decision and how to make it, is what your LifeStylist can help you with.

It is a basic need, yet so difficult to master the skill-set needed and thus so profound that you get help to achieve it in order to find happiness and gain freedom in life.

Don't allow yourself to stay chained to your past like a prisoner sentenced to life.
Contact your LifeStylist to break the habit of being you!

The Scent. Of Blood.

Why is it that we tend to repeat the very behaviors that we ourselves have been hurt by in the past.
Shouldn't it be crystal-clear that in order to not cause any more pain in our own and others lives, then we must never engage in behaviors that we KNOW will cause pain?

Thing is, it is a fine line - because one needs to have cut oneself in order to know the scent of blood, and know how to heal the wounds before the cut gets too deep and the blood drains; leaving the victim lifeless.

The scent of blood is tied to a deep longing to be loved.

If you don't know the scent of blood you have no clue on how to pick up the warning signs of scratched skin in others, and you will not be able to show empathy, because we can only connect to things that we have ourselves been exposed to in some form or another; you need to have felt pain to know what pain looks like in others. If you do not know what blood is, how can you stop someone from dying? You will simply wander through the bloodbath oblivious to the pain and suffering.

On the other hand: If your cuts are so deep, that they have drained your blood, and left you emotionally dead, then you will be drawn to the scent of blood like sharks in the ocean. You will find pleasure in others pain, because you have not healed yourself, and you are hurting so deeply that the only thing that can temporarily relief you from your misery is that someone else is in more pain than you.

And thus, hurting others becomes your coping mechanism; your life vest to keep you from drowning.
You more or less consciously seek out your victims, suck their blood and leave them lifeless - just like you once were. Yes, vampires do exist.

In order to break the habit of sucking out the life of others, you need to become conscious first. Because when people hurt others, they do it on auto-play - it is a habit so deeply ingrained in them that it is like breathing, they have led themselves to believe that it is necessary for their very survival.
How do you know if you are a vampire? Well, look at the trail of blood you have left behind. We will all have some blood stains behind us here and there, but if there literally is a trail of blood, then you are addicted to misery.

You cannot quit cold-turkey even though this is not a drug per se, but it still serves as your life vest - a survival mechanism. Most likely you don't even know you are doing it, but simply feel that you are a victim of bad luck.

And this in itself should be a warning sign: There is no such thing as bad luck, only bad choices.
You can learn to make better choices. Choices that slowly enable you to let go of the pain of the past and your addiction to misery.
It's human to be drawn to the dark side, but that does not make it any less painful nor acceptable.

You have a choice to change the way you act and react - affecting those around you, as well as your own life. Every time you hurt someone else, you step further away from happiness - even if you find instant gratification in the moment.

Stop hurting others. You are hurting yourself.

Monopolizing misery.

Meet client A: She is  21, comes from a wholesome family, tall and slender, has a loving and handsome boyfriend and her dad’s credit card in her pocket. And yet she cries herself to sleep every night, covers the mirrors in self-hatred and does coke on the weekends. She has no deep traumas. Spoiled brat, is she?

Meet client B: She is 23, sexually abused by her dad since her mother died when she was in her early teens. Everyone can understand that she cuts herself to distract herself from the emotional pain, prefers vodka over water and can’t hold a job (...).

Question: Who has the right to pain of the two? 

Answer: Both. Pain is in perception. Life hurts. Everyone cries. And they both hurt equally much. It is not what you go through in life, but how you deal with it.

Everyone has the right to pain, ironically people somehow tend to compete in that area, addicted to misery and yearning for pity: Demanding the right to misery, insisting that certainly their situation is unique; their life is so much tougher than anyone else’s (...)

If there is one thing I have learnt in life, it is that everybody hurts sometimes. No one hurts more than others. And yet it seems that there is this competition going on “who has it tougher”. I don’t get it: Aren’t we supposed to change what we don’t like in life, instead of continue being in a situation that cause us to complain day in and day out.

Isn’t insanity defined by the very act of doing the same thing over and over again, yet expecting a different outcome...?

If so, insanity is the new normalcy. 

And that is just plain sad. It is certainly nothing to brag about.

Animals know pain, but no self-pity.

If you don’t like the cards you have been dealt, then play a different game.

Why continue to play a game that you hate? That makes no sense.

Only humans tend to be addicted to misery and demand pity. It is an incredibly selfish act, this trying to manipulate others via emotional pornography. Everyone deserves empathy and love, but using emotions to manipulate is pure selfishness.

I have never seen an animal feel sorry for itself. They take the hits, and then they move on. Kittens tumble and fall, and their mothers watch from a distance, ensuring that they can handle the hit, but don’t intervene unless a matter of life and death. They learn from an early age that “hey, life hurts, and it’s going to kick you til you lie down, so you might as well learn to protect yourself, lick your wounds, and then get back up”. Even when animals die, do they demand pity and cry? No, they carry themselves with pride, and bundle up to die. That is life. Death is a natural part of life. And if one has faith in God, then death is not the end.

Pain is universal, it’s not a competition about who hurts the most - because everyone hurts. It is about finding a solution and healing the scars: Everyone deserves to be loved. And oftentimes those who cry in silence need it more than those who open the watergates in public in a vain attempt to gain pity and attention.


If you need help to redesign your life, contact your Life Stylist - we can help you out of misery. We understand the biochemical and emotional complexities when changing your life, whether you a struggling with an addiction due to an imbalanced brain chemistry or stuck in self-destructive black/white addictive thinking causing fear and anxiety to take up your focus.

There are many ways to commit suicide...

Some of us do it by the knife and fork; gluttony.
Some of us do it by drugging ourselves with Rx meds for years; escaping our emotions.
Some of us take on dead-end jobs that go nowhere; finding solace in never taking risks and being rejected.
Some of us stay in abusive relationships; finding comfort in negative reinforcements of how little value we add.
Some of us prefer to do it in public and hang out at bars after work; numbing our spiritual needs.

What are we trying to hide; what are the feelings that we don't feel comfortable dealing with?
Why are we so scared of leaving our comfort zone when it is obvious to anyone from the outside that it is hurting us?
Why are we so scared of dying, when the truth is that the majority of us live lives that are like walking deads and we even actively engage in activities that numb us out; disabling us from experiencing the flavors of life.

We all die in the end. And yet everyone seems to obsess about it; things that are beyond our control. It's a funny thing that humans tend to turn into control freaks concerning things that they will never be able to control, and yet the basic things in life that we can control - we never do.
We don't take control of our lives and make it happen. Instead we pursue things that will only bring failure. Maybe it is the appeal of knowing the outcome already, so we don't have to deal with our dreams being crushed like glass shattered on the floor. We will just crush them already - that way we don't have to deal with disappointment, because we dare not dream.
But we should, because without pain there would be no healing. Without hurt there would be no recovery. Without vulnerability there would be no strength.

I'm not afraid of the inevitable that is beyond my power, but I am afraid of not living while I am alive.
You are the only one who is in control of your life while you are alive.
You are the only one who can take responsibility for your outcome in life.
There is no one to put the blame on but you.
Is this the life you want?

Or are you slowly self-destructing...