Where. Do you go.

When the night falls, and the shadows grow long, and there is nothing to distract you. 

But the sounds of silence.

I love that timespan from dusk til midnight, when everything is silent. There are no blinding lights for you to lose sight.  The hush has come to an end. It is like time stands still.

And you watch the summer-breeze play in the trees. It's like there is this gap in time - the day has not come to a definite end, and tomorrow has yet to come. 

It is in this timespan that dreams come true. 

It is in this gap, when everything has yet to begin again, that decisions are made and new beginnings arise with dawn.

It is in this timespan that you can breathe, and yet you are breathless. 

Happiness is being who you are meant to be.
Disappearing into that moment.  Just be.

It is in this timespan that your ego and everything out of this world that is ephemeral matters not.

It is then, that you can listen to the sounds of silence if you listen very carefully, then you will hear the whispers that tell you where to go when you feel lost in translation.

Just be. In that moment. There are no boundaries but those that you set yourself in your mind.

Just let go of yourself. And be. Who you are meant to be. Embrace it. And you'll never have to struggle with not fitting into a shoe that is not the right fit and never will be.

Thirst. is. EvErYtHiNG.

Image is nothing.
That was the tagline for Sprite when I was a kid. That just stuck to my brain like glue. I loved that commercial. So simple, yet it is so powerful in the way it taps right into our basic human instincts - and it is everything I believe in, and aspire to be in life. Well, not that I aspire to be a can of soda exactly. It is the simplicity, the unpretentiousness, I find appealing in this "stripped-to-the-core-skip-the-emotional-pornography-BS" ad.

It just illustrates everything that matters: Humans are hedonistic beings, and when all is said and done, we are going to do what makes us FEEL GOOD.

There comes a point, when we have binged one time too many on the lies from a society that is driven by sick standards and ruthless motives that we feel sick to the core with all the shallow glossy ads telling us that happiness comes from a Botox injection, Agent Provocateur lingerie and a bright yellow Gallardo. Well, not that there is anything wrong with a Gallardo per se, I mean... if it is good enough for batman, who am I to complain. Afterall, we do need something for driving our surfboards down to the shore in, don't we... Bare essential really. Ok so I'm a sucker for fast cars. Anyway.

Back to the point. I am always amazed by the amount of insecurity and pretentiousness that contaminates the bare presence of people who supposedly have "made it". And God only knows they grow like weed in the city that never sleeps. Where everyone hungers for their 5 minutes of fame. And they will inject their lips with the fat taken out of their ass in their narcissistic vanity to win the fame game.

I just hope they understand, that somehow the clothes do not make the man.
And that for every Armani suit and fake bleached smile, and Manolo stiletto there are 40,000 children starving.


So, ask yourself - what drives you in life?
No, really ask yourself: What DRIVES you in life?
Do you know it, or are you being driven by others motives and agenda perhaps.

Don't hate the player - hate the game, and refrain (from being part). 

Unconditional Love. What is?

"Why don't you just love yourself some more?" I remember a friend telling me some years ago when I was busy "finding myself", or so I thought.
As you live life, you figure out that life is not about finding yourself, rather it is about creating yourself. You already have what you need right there, wherever you are, within you.
I was dumbfounded - love yourself some more? Why? How is that possible?
Well, this fundamental ability to love yourself unconditionally - wherever you are in life, whatever obstacles you are dealing with, is the most important human skill in life.
Every other skill and ability - however well we may master it, becomes secondary if we can't love ourselves unconditionally. Because guess what - if you can't love yourself without needing to live up to a set of criteria - how can you love anyone else? Love is supposed to be unconditional - what is the point in saying, "Well, darling you know, I'll love you if x, y and z. And don't forget the dishes while you're at it!". That is not love. That is a businesses proposal. Love is a feeling, it is not based on rational nor logic. And it shouldn't be. Emotions are valuable in themselves.

If you don't love yourself, you can't love anyone else. You may find yourself in various relationships based on vanity and fear. Fear of being alone and thus needing others approval out of vanity. Vanity and fear make for an ugly cocktail. You can't receive and accept love if you have cut yourself off from accepting yourself. And if you don't love anyone else, what value are you adding to the world then?

Yes, it may seem harsh - but love is the only thing that matters in life.

Eat. Breathe and.. Love. Always love.

And if you find it so hard to do, then get a pet. Yes, I said a pet, because entering a relationship before you love yourself is a disaster. However much another human may love you, if you don't love yourself, you will find a way to destroy that relationship. And when you say, "it is not you, it is me" - which you will undoubtedly say at some point down the road, that will be the exact truth and not an excuse. Simply because you cannot return the love that that person is showing you, as long as you don't know how to love yourself unconditionally. We can only connect to feelings that we ourselves have experienced. Mind you, that doesn't mean that we must have endured the same experiences - no, it is the feelings we must have experienced in order to connect and show empathy.

Getting an animal, and learning how to take care of it, is like taking a baby-step before learning to walk. Watch how that cat or dog loves you unconditionally. Unconditionally is not the same as accepting abuse, however. Putting up with abuse is incompatible with loving yourself, which must come before loving another human being. A cat will leave you, if you don't treat it with the respect that every living creature deserves. That's one thing I love about cats: You set it free to run in the morning when you wake up, and then when you call its name in the evening when you come home - and it comes back to you; then you know, it loves you. Because as the saying goes: when you set something free, and it comes back to you, it is yours.

It is yours because it chooses to be yours.

And I think that is the most amazing thing: That a wild creature, born to run free, chooses to give itself to you completely. Trusts you to take care of it.
You can only truly do that, if you take care of yourself.

Show me your shell, and I will judge you.

What if we were all the same; the shell that contains our soul was the same to the judging eye.
The first impression - would be what?
The scent. The voice. And then perhaps the actual contents of what we have to say.

And you wonder - all those people dealing with daily insecurities because of their bodily flaws according to our sick standards in society - would they blossom, when they no longer struggled with their imperfections?
Would they find inner peace, if there no longer was anyone condemning them for their visible shortcomings?
Would we in fact be flawless if we no longer strived for external perfection.

Sometimes I wonder: What if we left all judgement to God where it belongs.
What if we stopped pretending that we have the answer.
What if we stopped lying. Playing games. With others and ourselves. Games of deceit.
Would we all win then?
The thing we want the most - to win. Would we win back life if we stopped playing the game.

What would this world be like.
If we all were naked - emotionally and in the same skin.

Would we dare more, evolve more as humans, connect with our inner call, because the outside was out of our control and mattered not?

Don't turn around (I heard her say).

In New York you do a lot of people watching. And people bumping. And something that rhymes on bumping. And people cursing. And people pleasing. And people hating. Just because there are people everywhere.
And a great place to watch people is in the metro. And it struck me: How many traces of bitterness on the faces... sitting there everywhere.
Bitterness is such an odd, unfamiliar feeling to me... it seems like such a waste of time, emotion and suffering to use on bitterness. Because nothing good ever comes from bitterness - it is like a dark shadow that sneaks up on you and suffocates you; while you try to drag everyone around you down with you.
And what is the point in that? That way everyone suffers and the only thing that is certain is that nothing constructive will arise from that feeling.

Yet it seems as if this is one of the top 5 most common feelings that humans allow into their life.
I was talking with a friend of mine whom had just been dumped. And she was extremely bitter. While it is understandable that it is painful; it's life. It has nothing to do with her per se. It does not make her of any lesser value. They were just not the right match, and perhaps he just realized it before she did. And so you move on. You cry. You accept it. And move on. No regrets, because there was a time where that may have been exactly what you were looking for - at that time, at that place in your life. It may have helped you develop some skills. However, things change, and you must be flexible to adapt. Don't look back.

And then I thought to myself, how come I don't feel bitter when people hurt me? Because I definitely feel hurt. And as most of Italian descent, I can get very angry a bit quick at times. But that's it - it never turns into bitterness. But that is only because whenever I have tried to suppress my anger, I notice right away that it turns into resentment - and that is one emotion that I can't afford in my life, because I simply cannot be creative and passionate, if I allow this feeling into my life. It is like giving up control of your life and accepting victimization. Thus, I must confront whatever the issue is that causes me to feel anger, before it turns into something toxic.

You have to first understand what initially triggers this feeling to prevent it from penetrating your life.

Typically you will get angry - and anger always occurs when we fear losing something - whether it be our ego or a physical thing. We can then either choose to deal with that anger and handle that conflict and move on; not turning back. Or, we can suppress our anger and avoid confronting the conflict.
This is where all of our internal alarm clocks should go off: Because this leads to a slow build-up of negative, unresolved emotions within us. What we resist, persists. So we become resentful. And as time goes by that resentment evolves into bitterness... and bitterness is very difficult to get out of your life once you have allowed that chain-reaction of thoughts and feelings to take place and infect your life.

Identifying your triggers in life and learning to deal with anger, instead of suppressing your feelings and letting it eat you up from inside, sets you free emotionally.

Cry. Scream. Yell if you must. Get it out of your system - find you coping mechanism.
But don't turn around. No regrets.

In Search of. Freedom.

Are you free?

Do you even know what it means to be free...

It is that feeling, when you wake up in the morning with the sunlight streaming down on your face and you breathe... you hear the birds chirping outside. For no particular reason do they sing; they are just happy to be.

It is that feeling, when you run barefoot along the sand, running through the white foam as the waves break on the beach.

It is that feeling, when you curl up in the window and watch life from far below, mesmerized by the pace.

It is that feeling when you walk deep beneath the oak trees and only hear the breaking of branches beneath you.

It is that feeling, when nothing matters yet everything does.

It is when everything just is, when you judge nothing - life flows and blows through you like the summer breeze caressing your skin.

You have everything you need. You are carefree and yet you care.

Life matters yet your worries are insignificant in the grande scheme of life.

That is freedom.

That is happiness.

And that is what every human aims for in life.

Freedom is when you let go of the chains of your past.
Freedom is when you judge nothing, and you let no one judge you.
Freedom is holding on to nothing, owning nothing.
Freedom is being in that very moment.

Free of the chains of your past.

You just decide to let go. 

Nothing can harm you but your own thoughts and fears.

No one has the power to chain you, except you.

And you are free to be whatever you want to be. Whenever you want to be.

You just make that decision; that NOW is the time. This time is forever.

That life changing decision and how to make it, is what your LifeStylist can help you with.

It is a basic need, yet so difficult to master the skill-set needed and thus so profound that you get help to achieve it in order to find happiness and gain freedom in life.

Don't allow yourself to stay chained to your past like a prisoner sentenced to life.
Contact your LifeStylist to break the habit of being you!

Absolutely nothing.

I love watching the waves crashing on the shore.
I could sit forever. Just there. And stare. Simply disappear. Into the deep blue.
The way the rich blackness of the night sky reflects in the thick mysterious calm.
And you wonder what lies beneath.

During the day when the wind picks up. The waves rise and crash in synchronic turmoil. Planned chaos. Structure only visible to those select few who look for it. In search of sunrise.

To others it seems scattered and unpredictable.

And then someone asks me how I feel.
And I say absolutely nothing.

I feel... nothing.
It's like an addiction.

After the rain has fallen...

the soil is wet and new flowers appear.

Sometimes stronger than before; as they fight their way through the asphalt.

I love the sensation of soft summer rain on my skin. 

There is something magical about thunderstorms in the heat of the summer. It is as if nature contradicts itself... the way the sky opens up to the heavens above. It leaves you with a feeling that everything is possible. In this very moment, if you want it bad enough, it is yours to redeem. 

There is something so naive about it. So pure. So fragile, as the cool raindrops mix with the salty sweat glistening on your skin. 

And yet, the thunderstorms leave you stronger...

The fragility gives you the ability to grow stronger.

I love soft summer rain.