Idol Birth Music

Its a yearly tradition to have a theme where our 10-12 Idol contestants (the tradition tends to rear its lyrical head early in the Finals shows) sing songs from the years of their birth.  Its been interesting to note that, while watching American Idol over these some odd 9 years or so (we neglected to watch Kelly Clarkson's win in the first season), the "year of birth" has been getting later and later.  That is to say that early on, Songs From your Birth Year featured stuff from you know, 1979, 1982 or maybe for those really young, 1986...

Now?  Songs from 1979 wouldn't qualify because it would put the Idol contestant at 31 or so, about 3 years over the age limit.  Tonight?  We have a song from 1995 make our auditions.  Nineteen.  Ninety.  Five.  That's a full two years after I graduated high school, and depending on exactly when the song was released, it would have found me as a sophomore or junior at Troy State University (Go Trojans!)

Because of a project I'm working on on Wednesday nights now--details coming soon--my Idol recap shows will mostly appear on Thursdays now, and I'll stick the results on the tail end of it.  All that said...

THIS

IS AMERICAN IDOL

Ah, its a beautiful day here at The Cabana... the Plantation Shutters are opened, the door shutters are wide open, the sunlight is pouring in, and the television is adjusted just ever so slightly so the glare is minimal!  Seacrusty reminds us that last week, ProActiv Spokeschick Ashthon Jones was given her walking papers, so Week Two of The Finals begins now.

Songs from your birth year, and this will give us people in our mid-30s a great indication of how old we exactly are...

And tonight, we begin in 1984, with Naboo Agrabahao, and videos of her parents show us that even they are wearing traditional African garb, complete with head wrap.  Tonight, Naboo is taking on Tina Turner's "What's Love Got to Do With It", which at the time, when I was 9, I thought the song was kinda dumb.  Years, decades later, my tastes a little more appreciative and refined, the song is quite a masterpiece.

Tell you what, though.. I wouldn't use the word "master" to describe the "piece" that Naboo's song is tonight.  Its terrible, and I don't say that only because I'm not a fan... it sounds awful.  Like, she would sound better if she were reading it with style.. awful. 

Crazy Creepy Uncle Stevie calls it... beautiful?  What?  What?  J-Lo builds her up first, but tells her that she's pitchy--even drawing some boos from the audience.  Randy the Dawg says the same thing. 

Thankfully, though, this might be what gets her kicked off the show.  Unless the judges save her.  A-freakin'-gin.

Next, back to 1984 again, Idol's version of Bradley Cooper, Pauly Mac, is singing Sir Elton John's "I Guess Thats Why They Call It the Blues", and this should be interesting.  I love this guy's voice, but it just doesn't fit this song.  Wasn't there a Rod Stewart song in 1984 that he could have taken on?  Maybe "Some Guys Have All The Luck" or "Infatuation"?  Just a thought.  Truly, though, he does sound good, revealing that he does have a sinus thing going on.

J-Lo says, "I feel you... you sounded good!".  Randy the Dawg doesn't give him a pass because Pauly Mac "because you have a cold, because singers have to deal with that.." but compares him to Ray LaMontigue, which is not bad.  Cool Uncle Steven Tyler says, "Your a cool dude in a loose mood..."

And now, 1995... Thiamegia was born.  Like, if I had started early, I could have been her dad.  In 1995, I think I was with Julie Haynes.  That's funny...

Where was I?  Okay, she's singing another ballad?  Really?  "Colors of the Wind", from Pocohontas, the Vanessa Williams version... not only do I not like the original, I don't like that movie, and its my least favorite Vanessa Williams song by a mile.  I dig Vanessa, but give me "Save the Best for Last" or the funky "Running Back to You", but not this one.

I just fast forwarded through it.  I'm sure she was fine.  Randy the Dawg said it was just "okay".  And he says it was boring, and to stop singing ballads.  Uncle Stevie says it was good, but wonders if that's who Thiamegia thinks she is.  J-Lo says to work on her vibratto.  Whatever.  It was crap. 

Let's take it back to the late 80s now with The Straight Adam Lambert.  His birth year?  1989.  I was in 9th grade, maybe 10th, and the biggest band dork ever.  Ever.  And watching his video interviews, I can see his Asberger's or Tourette's coming out--his eyes twitch repeatedly.  Like he's squinting in the sun, but he's doing it over and over.

"I'll Be There For You" by Bon Jovi is the song, and I hate that I didn't get to see this with The Lovely Steph Leann, because she might have been a puddle on the floor.  She LOVES her some Bon Jovi, and truly, this song was the favorite song of every chick I knew in 1989--from my classmate Tonya Windham to the hot senior Sandy Wright--Bon Jovi was the love of anyone and everyone who was the female gender.  And even some male genders (I was going to toss a name in here, but I'll refrain, James Rodgers.  Oh come on, we were all wondering.)

As for The Straight Adam Lambert, not bad.  Not great, but not bad.  The song itself is what, 34 minutes long, with 11 minutes of guitar intro, so I guess its hard to pick up a good 90 seconds to go with.   Uncle Steven Tyler says, "What?  1989?  I have sandwiches under my bed older than you!  Don't get too poppy on me!"  And The Straight Adam Lambert smiles back, "I'm saving Aerosmith for the Finale!"   That's awesome.

1989 was a good year for Aerosmith too, with the album "Pump" still going strong, with "Janie's Got a Gun", "Love in an Elevator" (which I'd be shocked to hear on Idol, because that song is so not Emmy Turnbow safe) and the rock on, broken hearted balled "What It Takes", that I still know every word to by heart. 

J-Lo thought he was great, as did Randy the Dawg.  I concur.

Seacrusty asks a loaded question... "What Whitney song will Haley Reinhart perform?"  Wow, Haley.. taking on 1990 Whitney Houston.   She's singing one of my three favorite Whitney songs, "I'm Your Baby Tonight".  I mean, this song is funky and cool and awesome and rockin and soulful and so on... so Haley, tread lightly.  This is WHITNEY.  Pre-crack Whitney, which means awesome Whitney.

Okay, so Haley isn't...

Well, she's not...

Okay, so she's singing okay, good enough I guess, but she's...

...um...

Fine.  She's not black enough.  There, I said it.  This isn't a racial statement, but to sing this type of Whitney song, you have to have soul.  Haley has a lot going for her, great smile and great voice, but soul?  No.  None. 



J-Lo starts the feedback, and I know its going to be bad.. "Hey... you look beautiful tonight..."  She beats around the bush in telling Haley that this was not the song for her.  Seacrusty comes out and helps her wipe a little stray lipstick off of Haley's chick.  How random is this? 

------------------------------

So, I would love to continue the reviews and the witty banter, giving you the full report, but unfortunately, here's what just happened... I finished Idol and the post... I was working on links, pictures and a video, and while I was jamming to said video, I noticed it stopped halfway through.  Lost connection.  Now, sometimes this does happen... but here, at The Cabana, its happened more and more.  I've been around and around with AT&T already, and they sent someone out here today to replace our cheap, piece of crap modem with a wireless one.. and it worked.  While the computer was sitting by the modem, while the guy was here.  Sort of like taking your car into the shop--the noises stop when Joe Goodyear is looking at it, right?

So, I get this page that says, "Your internet connection has been broken"... and then ten seconds later, it says "Hey, we fixed it!  Just close your browser and you'll be up and running on the interweb, pancho!"  So, naturally, because I'm an idiot who doesn't think--ask The Lovely Steph Leann, ask any of The Deuce Guys, ask Melanie--I just closed it and re-opened it, expecting to find what had been saved to be there. 

Of course, it wasn't.  So, you will not get to read my whole thoughts on Peepee Tuscany, Stefano Italiano, Deep Voiced Scotty, America's Darlin' Lauren Alaina, The Soulful Jacob Lusk, Casey A, K-Rod, nor will you get to read the lead-up to me saying, "If I were a lesbian, this would be my anthem."  So, I'll just do what I did last week, give you the quick one line to those that my reporting didn't save. 

Peepee Tuscany... Favorite of the night.  Brilliant Whitney.  Safe

Stefano Italiano... This kid is growing on me, and he sounded great.  Safe

America's Darlin' Lauren Alaina... She did well, but nothing flashy.  Safe.

The Soulful Jacob Lusk... Judges loved him, but I thought he was terrible.  Safe tonight, though.

Casey A... I've heard him better, but his risky take on Nirvana was old.  Safe.

K-Rod.  Horrid.  Horrid.  In danger.

Deep Voiced Scotty... He did his thing, and he did it well.  Safe.

Also safe is The Straight Adam Lambert... I think Pauly Mac and Thiamegia are borderline, and Neoxmia Agrahbah and, unfortunately Haley, are in danger. 

Results tonight!

Whatev! Results NOW!!!


The good thing about Idol Results shows is that I can fast forward, alot. Tonight, we won't hear musical performances from The Black Eyed Peas and Lee DeWyze, and we won't see a new Ford music video, and we won't see a group performance... we will see 12 people squirm in their seats until the Couch of Anxiety becomes the Couch of Safety, and we'll see 3 people head to the Silver Stools of Failure. And one goes home. And unless is Niagra Fallsagogo, the judges won't save 'em.

THIS IS AMERICAN


IDOL RESULTS!!

Seacrusty follows Randy the Dawg, Crazy Creepy Uncle Stevie and Jennifer Lopez out, and its another exciting show!

We do get an update on the American Red Cross drive from last night... if you text REDCROSS to 90999, it will send $10 for Japan relief. Say what you want about Idol, they do alot of compassionate work for our world. Go Idol.

Aaaaand.... I just cut out about 10 minutes of show by fast forwarding through the Group Song, the commercials and the Ford Video. I love the power of DVR. Seacrusty instructs everyone to look under their seats in the audience, and the audience each finds a copy of the 10th Anniversary Idol Compilation, the best from the last 10 years of Idol.

Cute little video montage of the Idols discussing their talents, their pets, their accents, their desires to learn foriegn languages, and Thiamegia takes a fun shot at America's Darlin' Lauren Alaina's twang.

Back to the stage, Seacrusty says, "Dim the lights", and an Irish song comes on, the stage goes green, and apparently, that wasn't supposed to happen, cause Seacrusty makes a joke about the stage director tossin' back the brew, and then calls for the "Tension... dim the lights please."

Up first, Casey A, The Soulful Jacob Lusk and America's Darlin' Lauren Alaina go to the center of the stage. I would imagine they will all be sitting on the Couch of Safety in a few seconds. Smart, though, go ahead and get the front runners out of the way. Seacrusty tells The Soulful Jacob Lusk he is safe.

Now, America's Darlin' Lauren Alaina, and Seacrusty sends her back to The Couch of Safety. And finally, Casey A... and predictably, Seacrusty sends him back to The Couch of Safety.

Seacrusty, you faker! But you didn't fool me this time! I'm on to your tomfoolery!

Now... Haley Reinhart and Pauly Mac... this will be a little harder. I can expect Haley to take a Silver Stool of Failure, though Seacrusty may pull a "you are both in the bottom three!" on us. You know that Seacrusty!  Pauly Mac has the whitest teeth I think I've seen on this show, and this kid cannot stop smiling.  Great thing, actually.

Seacrusty says one is safe, the other is in the bottom three... and its Haley, like I expected.  Pauly Mac will be around next week, as he takes his place on The Couch of Safety, meanwhile Haley forces a grin from the Silver Stools of Failure.

Fast forwarded through two commercial breaks, sandwiched around an American Idol Winner Lee DeWyze performance that I didn't hear at all. 

Next is Deep Voiced Scotty, Peepee Tuscany and The Straight Adam Lambert, and I'm guessing Seacrusty will do another all-three-are-safe trickeration.

Deep Voiced Scotty is safe.  Peepee Tuscany is safe.  And The Straight Adam Lambert, as long as he keeps performing at least decently, doesn't have to worry much until they get down to about 7 or 8.  And... he's safe.

Told you!  I'm on to your shenanigans, Ryan Seacrusty!

Now... Stefano Italiano and Naimey Aquafina are up.  And I predict Stefano Italiano heads to The Couch of Safety, and Nameya heads to The Silver Stools of Failure.  Am I right?   Yup.  (and I typed "yup" as Seacrusty said "After the nationwide vote..." and before he said "Stefano is safe")

Now, K-Rod and Thiamegia.  K-Rod, bottom three easily.  She was dreadful.  And the judges are on crack if they said she was better than last week... she did that Selena song, but her cover of Taylor Dayne probably made Taylor Dayne want to kill herself.  Wouldn't shock me if Thiamegia was in the Bottom Three, because her song "Color of the Wind" was sooooo boooorrinnnggg... one is safe, the other is not.  After the nationwide vote... Thiamegia is safe.

Do I know this show or do I know this show?  I'm wise to your strategery, Seacrusty.  The Bottom Three, Haley, Neoxmea and K-Rod...

I fast forwarded through the commercials and was going to go through The Black Eyed Peas, but caught sight of Fergie in her white dress... okay, she fascinates me.  She's sexy, yet borderline skanky. 

Alright, enough of that.  Fast forward through the song, and commercials.

Seacrusty is going to send one of the Bottom Three to the Couch of Safety... and that person is... Noxema.  Curse it all!  We can't get rid of her!  She's like acne that just won't stinkin' go away!  Well, let's get rid of K-Rod at least... Seacrusty says, "The person in danger of leaving us tonight is... K-Rod."

Now, Seacrusty might as well have said, "Since neither one of you are named Naimey or Casey A, the person who WILL leave us tonight, because the judges aren't going to save either of you, is..."

With tears in her eyes, she sings Mariah's "Hero" (which I fast forwarded through), and the judges deliberate to tell her no.  Randy the Dawg tells her its not unanimous, but they aren't going to use the save on K-Rod. 

Bye.

Milwaukee's Best Idol

Sitting with Amarylis By Morning (up from san antone), Hurricane Rhett, JustFish and his wifey wife KellFish, the reviews are in... Idol... is pretty good.  Okay, JustFish and KellFish didn't really give an opinion, but Amarylis By Morning (up from san antone) and Hurricane Rhett are digging it.  And so is The Lovely Steph Leann and so am I.

Tonight, its the third episode of Idol 2.0, with Steven Tyler, J-Lo and Randy the Dawg, and we open up with Steven and Randy doing a little freelance version of "Sweet Emotion", one of my favorite Aerosmith songs.  No joke, its a great driving song.

We're coming from Milwaukee, WI, the home of The Widower Danny Gokey... and in fact, we see The Goke himself talking to some of the crowd.

THIS IS

AMERICAN IDOL!!!!!!

Scotty from Garner, NC, is up first.  He's clean cut, he's dressed to the nines, and he's 16.  If Paula Abdul was here, her room keys would be thrown at Scotty's feet.  "Your Man" by Josh Turner is his song... and I'm glad he's singing this song, because that's one of those songs that I keep hearing, but didn't know who sang it.  I'm going to download it right now.

The Lovely Steph Leann looks up at me, and says, "He's so smooth...."

At the judges request, Scotty from Garner sings "Put Some Drive in Your Country" by Travis Tritt, which makes Steven Tyler say something about getting something, get the matches, &#*$ a duck and see what hatches.  What the?

Scotty from Garner heads to Hollywood.

The Lovely Steph Leann looks up at me from under her blanket and says, "I'd listen to him on the radio..."

I just down loaded "Your Man" by Josh Turner.

Joe Repka comes up... and sometimes you can just tell this is going to be a disaster.  He's kinda tall, he's kinda frumpy, he's got a fat head, he's got a bad 'stache, he's dressed horribly... this is going to a train wreck of heavy duty proportions.   Seacrusty just talks to him like Joe actually has a chance. 

And the judges know this is going to be bad too.  He says he is 19, but he could pass for 31.   And when he says he's going to sing "The Longest Time" by Billy Joel, both The Lovely Steph Leann and I groan.  And when he actually starts singing, she grimaces, I giggle, Steven Tyler sways and J-Lo hangs her head. 

Steven Tyler says, "Do not quit your day job.  Brutally honest."  The others agree.  And Joe jumps into the classic Idol mistake of, "They hated my first song, so I'll sing something without being prompted so they will hear me sing beautifully..." and in all my years of watching Idol, I have never seen this work.

From the previous commercial break, we see a chick saying something original like, "This is my dream", while crying.  Well, now we see her and her family in an SUV, and she tells us how she was 5 when Kelly Clarkson won the first Idol (The Lovely Steph Leann whimpers, "We are so old"), and how they came from Colorado, and drove 16 hours to Milwaukee.

Emma Henry, 15, is singing "True Colors" from Cyndi Lauper... personally its one of my least favorite songs ever, but she's not doing as badly as I thought she would.  Steven Tyler says he likes her character, J-Lo says she needs to keep working on her quality, and Randy the Dawg says he's not sure that she is ready.  J-Lo says no, and she needs to work on it. Steven Tyler says yes.

"I want this so badly, music is my life..." she starts crying, cue the sad music.  Randy the Dawg says she's going to be swallowed up in this whole process.  She whimpers, and says, "I'm going to work so hard!"  Randy the Dawg relents, and Emma Henry shouts for joy as she gets her golden ticket.

My own opinion?  She's got talent, and she's pretty good... but she needs to be trained up.  She needs more work, and I think she'll be pheeeeenomonal.  The Lovely Steph Leann agrees.

Trailer for "The Roommate" comes on.  The Lovely Steph Leann pipes up, "I've seen that movie!"  When I look at her, bewildered she's seen a movie that hasn't been released yet, she says, "Yeah, I've seen it.  Its called 'Single White Female' with Jennifer Jason Leigh!"
And we're back, with a quick montage of people who think they can sing, but cannot sing.  ATTENTION IDOLOONIES... DO NOT AUDITION WITH LADY GAGA.   DOESN'T MATTER THE SONG, DON'T AUDITION WITH LADY GAGA'S MUSIC.  BAD, BAD, BAAAAA IDEA.  Thanks.

And now, we hear about SummerFest, a huge music festival in Milwaukee, and we meet Aduba Malukaahaa, or whatever her name is, who works ground crew at SummerFest.  And Idol will change her life.  Sometimes she cries because her music means so much to her.  Her words, not mine.

So Naiuma Arkardapoo is going to sing Donnie Hathaway, and shockingly... she's not bad.  Actually, she's pretty good.  Here I was all set to make fun of Noxema Alahyoudaoo, and here she goes and does her thing right.  And she goes to Hollywood with three yes votes. 

I look forward to not being able to spell, type or pronounce Nobooboo Arachanidco's name in the future.

Back from break!   We see a somersaulting contestant somersault straight into a cameraman and it was awesome.  Here's the montage of bad songs... including a "Jenny from the Block" take.

Jerome Bell, a bar-mitzvah singer, is singing "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye.  He brings it loud, a little over the top.  I'd like to think of Song of Solomon had a soundtrack, this song would be it.  Yay God.

The judges dig Jerome's groove, and he's headed to Hollywood.

The Lovely Steph Leann:  I'd like one single year without that song being used in an audition.
Me:  I haven't heard any Mariah or Whitney so far
The Lovely Steph Leann:  I'm okay with that too.  But no more "Let's Get It On".

Seacrusty discusses the age limit being dropped to 15, partly due to the popularity of 9 year old Justin Bieber.  Thia Megea is 15, one of the many 15 year olds who have auditioned. 

"Chasing Paper" by Adele is her song.   And she's fantastic.  She sounds like she's 29 years old, and a veteran.  And she kinda sounds like a sista, too, though her look is more Hawaiia'n.... and they all say yes, so Thia is headed to Hollywood.

And every 15 year old that came in walked out with a Golden Ticket.  Steven Tyler says, "Thank God for people who can sing..."  And we see the teaser for the bad, bad singers to come.

Back from break, we see a guy named Nathaniel who is a Civil War Re-Enactor.  Was the Civil War in Wisconsin?  Was that a state in the 1860s?  No, I'm being serious.... that's a real question... Nate is in full Civil War regalia, and his dad is joining him, looking totally like a hippy.  Nate tells us, however, that dad is not a hippy.. "He's not a hippy!  Hippies have sex!"

When Nate walks in, J-Lo mutters, "oh no..."  And she was right for saying that... because "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" is being slaughtered with a Civil War musket.   And the judges mock him, though Steven Tyler does it a little more discreetly.

This next guy can barely start, he's so nervous, and he ends up facing the other wall, composing himself.  He should have just walked out.  Yikes.  Neither me or the woman knows the song, but it doesn't matter, because it was gawd-awful. 

The next girl? "I am an intern at the White House and I'm in love with this president."  I now don't like this chick and will root against her completely.  She went to Harvard, so she is probably extremely book smart... but seriously?  In love with the President?   "Sitting on the Dock of the Bay" is her song of choice, and she's not as bad as I want her to be.  Molly Swenson is her name, by the way.  Or I'll just call her The Idealistic Ignorant Molly.  She goes to Hollywood.

After the break, its Day Two!

Back from break, its Day Two!

The bubbly, pretty, toothy Haley Reinhart comes in, telling us this is everything she wants.  She auditioned last year, and didn't make it, so now she's back.  "Oh Darling" is her song, and I guess she got better, because she sounds great.  Steven Tyler loves her.  J-Lo loves her.  Randy the Dawg loves her.  Haley is Hollywood!

And from Chicago, its Tiwan!  He's busting out some Sam Cooke, and The Lovely Steph Leann pipes up, "I like him.  He needs braces.  But I do like him."  He sounds good.  They all like him, and Tiwan and his Elliott Yamean teeth head to Hollywood.

"It looks like his mouth needs, you know, three more teeth to fill in the spaces," The Lovely Steph Leann adds in.

Steve is a CPA, and is an auditor... "So I really don't have many friends," he says.  He adds, "I'm a wedding and funeral singer... weddings tend to be more fun."  And he has the humor of an auditor.  His voice is not great, but its not bad.   Both The Lovely Steph Leann and I are going back and forth on whether we like him or not...

Steven Tyler likes him.  Randy the Dawg says yes.  J-Lo says yes.  And Steve the auditor goes to Hollywood.

And here comes the girl from the teaser, when Seacrusty said, "And the judges have a showdown..."  Vernika is singing "Loving You" by Minnie Riperton, and "singing" is a stretch.  I just looked around and the glass on the front door of The Cabana just cracked. 

J-Lo tells her no, and how its not going to work.  Steven Tyler says she won't work for this show.  Vernika declares that "half'a dese peoples don't even sing good, I sing better than then half'a dese people.  Its cause I ain't skinny."  And she walks out, straight past Seacrest and the camera. 

We get a few crying chicks, including a few choice words by some, a mama who is protective of her kid (who she then tells to shut up), and a dude who drops his own words. 

Back from break, we get Albert Rogers III, who thinks he sounds like Usher, Ruuuuuben Studdard and Luther Vandross.  He's going to sing "Stand By Me", and J-Lo starts to giggle.  She knows what's coming.  And its a disaster.  Albert Part III is trying way, way too hard... and he gets a no from the judges.

Scott Dangerfield comes out, a 22 year old student teacher in shorts, a long sleeve button and square glasses.  He's going to sing "Dreamin'" by Amos Lee.  And right out'ta gate, Scott throws down and does it right.  J-Lo says, "You might just be my favorite so far." All the judges say YES enthusiastically.  The Lovely Steph Leann says, "I wasn't expecting that... and he kinda has a Jodie Foster look about him."

Back from Break!

And now we see one of the Green Bay Packers biggest fans ever.  Or so she says.  She loves the Green-n-Gold... her name is Megan Frasier, 20, and yells "Go Pack Go!" to the judges.  She's going to sing "Baby" by The Beebs, and its atrocious.  The judges all yell, "NO!" at the same time.

Alyson Jados is shown in tears when Steven Tyler came through the crowd early in the day.  And now, she goes to meet the judges, Steven Tyler included, who gives her a giggly-inducing hug.  She's going to sing "Come Together" and gives it that rocker edge, sort of a Allison Iraheta tone. 

She continues with "Dream On", though she admits she can't hit that last note, which Steven Tyler fills in.  He then tells her she's very pitchy, J-Lo tells her she's got a good quality, and Randy the Dawg says he doesn't think she's ready.  J-Lo says yes.  Now, its up to Steven Tyler to determine a yes or no.  Of course, he says yes. 

And now we get one last guy, which is our Sob Story (always disguised by the phrase, "his incredible journey") of the night.  Chris Medina is 26, from Chicago.  He's engaged to be married, and she works at a Starbucks!  She was recently in an accident, and she has a traumatic brain injury... and in a month or so, she woke up, with severe movement disabilities. 

"Break Even" by The Script is his song, and he slows it down to a bluesy kinda of jam.  Snapping fingers, he belts it out, and sounds great.  The judges ask to meet his girlfriend, and they wheel her in to meet the judges.  They shower her with hugs, kisses and love, and its probably one of the most sincere moments I've ever seen on Idol. 

You wouldn't see that with Simon. 

Milwaukee puts forth 53 contestants to Hollywood, out of the 1000s that showed up... and tomorrow night, its Nashville! 

...And Lee is None DeWyzer (Idol IX Finale 2)

So here's last night's recap show...

And here we are.  Seven hours of fluff to give us 12 seconds of news.  Rock on.

THIS IS THE AMERICAN

IDOL

FINALEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Sez Amarylis By Morning (up from san antone):  American Idol 10 (its Season 9-d$) is the biggest snoozer since Jordan Sparks won it. There is zero anticipation for me.

8p... Yes, this show started at 7pm tonight, and yes, its 8pm, and we just started.  The Lovely Steph Leann and I decided on dinner first, and we headed to The Purple Onion over here on 280.  The owner of our favorite location on Hwy 31 is apparently owning this one too, because he was sitting there in the cafe.  And it was awesome.  I love me some Purp'O, and I'm happy a great location has opened up less than 3 miles from The Cabana, instead of the 10+ mile trek we have to usually make.

The judges are introduced, and The Lovely Steph Leann's first question:  "What in the bejeebers is Randy Jackson wearing??"

8:04p... The finalists come down the steps, and we both notice that Lee and Crystal are all wearing Preparatory Outfits.  We are confused, until the Top 12 are introduced and I realize they are doing "School's Out" by Alice Cooper.  Glee this ain't.

About to fast forward through the group song when I notice none other than Alice Cooper himself, Christ Follower (no, seriously) and staunch Republican, come out.

Fast Forward through Commercials

8:08p... About to fast forward through Kris Allen and The Lovely Steph Leann tells me to put down the remote as he is about to sing his new single, "The Truth".  As Seacrest sends it to Kris, and Kris begins, we still hear Seacrest and some backstage chick talking.  Really, Fox?  Your the biggest show in the country for what, 7 years running?  Get this right.

8:11p... A montage of Simon Cowell clips, as this is his final Idol.  Many of these audition clips I actually remember.  A great appearance of Paula the Flake... I miss Paula. 

8:13p... Siobhan Magnus and Aaron Kelly.  Doing us the Bee Gees. 

8:13p... The Lovely Steph Leann tells me I can fast forward, but I'm intrigued by the fact that Siobhan and Aaron are singing "How Deep Is Your Love"... and then , the curtain rises, and out comes Barry Gibb, and another guy I can only assume is another Gee.   The last time Barry Gibb was on this show was really, really bad... a few seasons back, they did Bee Gees week, and Barry performed "To Love Somebody", and it was so bad, so terribly bad, that years later, I still randomly break out with a "there's a.light.  some kinda light." in mockery--and it still sounds better than that night.

8:16p... Barry Gibb sounds marginally better

8:16p... The camera pans to David Hasselhoff in the audience.  The Lovely Steph Leann pipes up, "There's The Hoff!  He's in every one of these finales!  The camera just finds him!"

Fast Forward through Commercials

8:18p... Big Mike comes out, singing a song that I cannot place... I don't know the lyrics, but I know the music... what is it... what is it....

8:19p... "Takin' It to the Streets"!  And here comes Michael McDonald!  The Lovely Steph Leann says, "I still have a hard time realizing this guy is white..."

8:20p... Michael McDonald is awesome.  "Sweet Freedom" from the '86 Billy Crystal/Gregory Hines piece of crap "Running Scared" was awesome.  "Keep Forgettin'" was awesome.  His lead on "What a Fool Believes" by the Doobie Brothers.  Awesome. 

8:22p... I have a hard time disliking Dane Cook.  I only say that because he's now onstage singing a comedic song dedicated to Simon.  Most people I know aren't Dane Cook fans, and certainly, if you've ever seen "Good Luck Chuck", you'll know why.  However, his movie "Employee of the Month", as terrible as it is, I'll watch it everytime its on, and laugh all the same.  Anyway, this Dane Cook bit tonight?  Pretty crappy.

Fast forward through commercials

8:25p... Lacey Brown singing Christina Aguilera's "Beautiful".  In the first five notes, we are reminded why she was kicked out in Week 12.  We fast forward through, til we see Xtina herself appear, leading the group in "Stronger"

8:26p... Christina Aguilera sings a new song.  We fast forward.

8:27p... Ricky Gervais appears via satellite to say goodbye to Simon the Cowell. 

Fast Forward through Commercials

8:29p... Lee DeWyze is on stage to sing Hall & Oates "I Can't Go For That (no can do)", which sounds really, really good.  It sounded great til Andrew Garcia joined him.  Casey James then leads us to "Maneater".  Now I'm wondering if Hall & Oates will make an appearance.  That would rule.

8:30p... Aaron Kelly singing this song is funny, because you know he has no concept of what this song even is, and who the artists are.  And he wouldn't even get the joke 'Ah, its Jeffrey Dahmer's theme song'. 

8:31p... HALL AND OATES!!!!!  I just told The Lovely Steph Leann that if they came anywhere near here, I'd totally go see them.  And they start singing "You Make My Dreams Come True".  About three lines in, The Lovely Steph Leann pipes up and says, "Dude.  Darryl Hall.  You are obviously too old for this."

8:32p... Law #8,878 I'm forcing through when I become president in 2028... John Oates is required to sport his 80s 'stache at all times.  At all times.  Shaving it is a punishable fine of $100,000 and/or up to ten years in maximum security prison.  Just sayin'.

8:34p... Crystal Bowersox comes out and sings "Ironic".   And then, as now expected, Alanis Morrisette herself comes out, starting out with "You Oughta Know".  How can I fast forward through this darn show when I actually want to watch the performances!?   Crystal changes a key line in the song, "Would she go down with you to the theater".  You know your old when you see that line, and immediately know what the original line is.  Hey, "Jagged Little Pill" was a college icon album for me, one of those "what CDs would you take with you to a deserted island" kind of albums.  Even The Lovely Steph Leann likes this CD, which is saying something, because a rocker chick she ain't.

8:36p... Alanis/Crystal duet.  AWESOME.  The Lovely Steph Leann is even singing along to "You Oughta Know".

Fast Forward through Commercials

8:42p... The Lovely Steph Leann and I have this quick, spirited discussion about whether "Jagged Little Pill" was a rock album or not.  I say yes, she says it was more alternative, to which I say, "Yes, alt rock."  I'm right.  Again

8:42p... Carrie Underwood comes out.  She's singing "Undo", a song I'm not a huge fan of.  I like Carrie, though, because she really shows how appreciative of Idol--she comes back all the time, and shows her gratitude frequently.  Unlike Kelly Clarkson, who seems like she wants to forget Idol is the reason she has a career.

8:44p... Typing that last paragraph, almost missed fast forwarding through the Ford Commercial.  Made it, though!

8:45p... Casey James introduced singing "Every Rose Has its Thorn", which makes me throw my hands up, saying "Bret Michaels is coming out!  Yeah!!"  How can you not like this guy, and this song?  Seriously.

8:47p... Okay, so Bret Michaels is having the best year ever.  I mean, "Rock of Love", "Rock of Love 2", "Skank of Love", "Rock of Love Bus", "Venereal Disease of Love 5" and all those shows, while it make him a punchline of sorts, made him relevant again.  And then, with the Celebrity Apprentice having such a great season this year (and it was awesome) and him doing so well, plus his medical issues--don't get me wrong, I don't wish ill on him at all, but everyone has felt for him, and learned to love him... he can do just about anything right now.

8:50p... Lee DeWyze is out now, joining the band Chicago for a medley of hits.  If I were to even think about fast forwarding, The Lovely Steph Leann would be on the phone with Brad J. Latta, Atty at Law, discussing divorce.  She loves loves loves her some Chicago.  Even the old crap. 

8:52p... Reality hits bigtime, as they start "If You Leave Me Now", and I say, "They sound unfortunate".  The Lovely Steph Leann pipes up, "Yeah, they sound a little like Hall & Oates.  Maybe Lee should sing the whole time..."

8:54p... Another Simon montage.  Then Seacrest says the magic words... "Pants On The Ground".  The Lovely Steph Leann pipes up, "Ohmigosh... they are actually doing this song on the stage?  Oh dear..."  They bring out the barely alive Bee Gees, then redeem themselves with Alanis, then a little off-key Hall & Oates, which I still love, and then they go all awesome with Michael McDonald and Bret Michaels.  And now?  The Pants guy... and William Hung.  No joke.

Fast Forward through Commercials

8:59p... Remember, we started this at 8pm, and we've got 30 minutes left to get through.  Another Simon montage... and here's Paula the Flake herself, looking absolutely gorgeous for the first time since, I dunno, 1994 and the "Rush Rush" video...

9:02... And now that she's talking, and I remember why I call her "Paula the Flake".  I'd like to think she's stumbling and bumbling because she's not reading from a prompter, but I can almost guarentee that she IS reading from a prompter... and she still sounds like this. 

9:05p... So, I guess the producers said, "Hey, Lee and Crystal can sing... but they have no personality... lucky for us we can concentrate on Simon's leaving and make the finale about that!   Hey, someone call Shady Oakes Retirement Village in Irvine and see if Barry Gibbs and John Oates and that singer from Chicago are available next week!"

9:07p... Here comes Kelly Clarkson!  And then Ruuuuuuben!  And Fantasia!  And then Carrie!  And then Taylor!  And now Jordin!  And now Kris!   Where's David Cook?? 

9:08p... They are doing a song that's something about "look what we've become..." or something.  I'm happy to see Kelly Clarkson here, though she looks like "I really don't want to do this..."  Anyway, the Idol winners are dressed in black, and out walks, in white, a ton of former Idol standouts, like Blake Lewis, David Archuleta, Ace Young, Mikaylah Gordon (okay, I said standout, but I guess anyone can come), Jason Castro, and.... PICKLES!!!  I love Pickles.

9:11p.... "Hey, fellow producer, let's remind America that this show CAN be great!  Let's get a whole bunch of former Idols up there to remind America what we've done!" 

9:12p... Simon gets up, says a few words, and gets misty eyed

Fast forward through commercials

9:13p... The Top 12 start out with "Again" by Janet Jackson, a lovely little ditty that I have on cassette singles.  And of course, here comes Janet... I do love this song.  My favorite Janet songs, starting with 5, is "Escapade"... 4) "Again"... 3) "The Best Things in Life Are Free", a duet with the late, great Luther Vandross from The Dave100 movie "Mo' Money"... 2) "Miss You Much"... and my favorite Janet song is "Love Will Never Do (without you)".  I love that tune.

9:15p... As Janet Jackson sings solo, we have this exchange:
Me: Ya know, she sounds a lot like Michael did towards his end there
The Lovely Steph Leann:  That's exactly what I was thinking!!!  I almost wonder if maybe she was doing his singing...

9:17p... I fast forward for just about 4 seconds before I stop it, realizing she's going to another song... and when I realize its "Nasty", I just set the remote down.  That's right.  Don't call me baby.  Its Janet, Jackson, if you're nasty.

9:20p... Seacrest:  Tonight... its about Lee and Crystal
Me:  No, no its not.  Its about Simon
The Lovely Steph Leann:  Lee who?  Who's Crystal?

9:22p... Lee and Crystal come out together to sing "A Little Help from My Friends", as made famous by The Beatles, but popularized by Joe Cocker on my #2 favorite tv show of all time, "The Wonder Years", recently supplanted from the top spot by "LOST".  And on cue, Joe Cocker comes out to sing a little.  And I think he just missed a line.  But man, he can still wail, even at the ripe old age of 104.

9:25p... After a brief debate on The Beatles version vs Joe Cocker's version, I go to the source.  Wikipedia.  Lennon and McCartney did it in 1967, but Cocker did a radically different version in '68, one that he performed at Woodstock, and it went on to be the version used by "The Wonder Years". 

Fast forward through commercials

Its 9:25p.  There is about 6 minutes left recorded on the show.  We are now concerned that we will miss the winner, unless Seacrest gets to it.

Its 9:27p... Dim the lights!  After the nationwide vote... the winner and new American Idol is...

...is...

...is...

...Lee DeWyze.

Okay, so there's that.

Lee is emotional, and its kinda sweet to see him almost speechless.  They pan to the judges and Simon looks bored, like he knows the wrong person won (and really... after last night, Crystal should have won this)  The Lovely Steph Leann says, "He should be bored and ready to leave.  Lee shouldn't have won... that should have been Crystal."

The Lovely Steph Leann is not upset at Lee's win because she doesn't think he's good enough, she's upset at Lee's win because "We needed a female to win.  Suck it." 

And what a fitting phrase to end a disappointing season of Idol.  Suck it.  Well said, The Lovely Steph Leann, well said.

Crystal Sings Her (bower)Sox Off... (Idol IX Finale 1)

Well, here we are.  Someone asked me earlier today if I was going to watch the Idol finale shows, and I sighed and said yes.  They asked me who I thought would win, and I sighed again and said, "I dunno.  Not sure if I care."  They asked me why I would still watch, and I sighed again and said, "Because I've invested far too much time into this season to not finish it."

And so it goes.

THIS IS AMERICAN

IDOL

It's Crystal vs. Lee.  Don't get me wrong... I think they are both talented.  Both have great voices, both have had numerous stand-out performances, and truly, through this season, America made the right decision when figuring out who to put in the Top Two.  That being said, neither are really all that... well, super.  Idol is looking for a superstar, and both are just... well, talented singers that are getting a bigger chance than most. 

And in a case of bad choreography, Lee ambles down the aisle, while Crystal starts off in a sprint, the mic booms like she drops something, she runs back and faces the camera looking confused.   Seacrest tells us they will be singing a song from this season, one as chosen by Idol producer Simon Fuller and finally, one that they'll be releasing if they win.

Lee DeWyze chooses "The Boxer" to sing as his song already performed this year.   Not bad, though it just sounds like what he did a few weeks ago during "Inspirational Week".   Randy the Dawg liked it, Ellen DeG says, "I couldn't be prouder if I birthed you myself".  Kara the New Hotness says she wants more.  Simon the Cowell wants a lot more.

Crystal Bowersox is reprising "Me and Bobby McGee" from #1s week, a song made famous by Janis Joplin.  She does it well, I guess, reminds me of Janis' original, which is good.  Randy the Dawg thought it was dope.  America's Favorite Lesbian Ellen DeGeneres calls her compelling.  Kara the New Hotness loves the fire in her (C'Bosox) belly.  Simon the Cowell says this was her best.

Now, the second song to be done by Lee DeWyze, singing "Everybody Hurts" from REM.  This song is a producer's choice. This was also a song from my college years, 1994 to be exact, from the album "Automatic for the People" back when REM was.. well, when they were relevent.  Seriously, the to' up the late 80s and early to mid-90s with this song, "Shiny Happy People", "The One I Love", "End of the World As We Know It (and I feel fine)" and of course, "Losing My Religion", that song where Michael Stipe just sits in a stool and flails his arms around in the video, looking almost cool doing it.

Ever seen the video to "Everybody Hurts"?   Like, all these cars get stuck on a bridge, and everyone gets out of their cars and start walking, much to the surprise of the newcaster narrating.  Oh, Randy, Ellen, Kara and Simon liked Lee here.

Back in school, there was a guy we knew obsessed with REM.  We used to kid around and tell him that REM stood for Rear End Men.  Turns out, years later, Stipe would prove that to be correct.  Go figure.  I was only more shocked when I found out that Nathan Lane was gay. 

Crystal comes out singing "Black Velvet", a song I destest and deplore.  And she's doing it in a dress that is not doing her curvy figure any favors.  I believe Clarice in "Steel Magnolias" said it best, at Shelby's reception... "looks like two pigs fightin' under a blanket"

Randy the Dawg loved it.  Ellen DeG loved it.  Kara the New Hotness loved it.  Simon the Cowell loved it.  Of course.


Personally, I like "Love Is", Alannah Myles "Black Velvet" follow up, much better.   You know, the last song she released before disappearing into obscurity.

If Lee DeWyze wins it all, this will be his song... "Beautiful Day" is the tune.   Is this... is this the U2 song?  Seriously?  I guess that makes sense... every song they attempt to write for the Idols absolutely blows chunks, so let's find a proven winner by rippin' someone else's song.

Randy the Dawg liked it.  Ellen DeG liked it.  Kara the New Hotness liked it.  Simon the Cowell liked it.  I thought it was good.

And Crystal's song is "Up to the Mountain (MLK Song)".  Its a song done by Patty Griffin, by also covered by Kelly Clarkson and Jeff Beck during Idol Gives Back in 2007.  And C'Bosox's version?  I thought it was fantastic.  Absolutely fantastic.   By the way, I didn't add the phrase (MLK Song) as any attempt to be cynical or sarcastic--thats part of the title. 

So sez Wiki:  "Up to the Mountain (MLK Song)" is a contemporary folk song written by Patty Griffin. The song touches upon emotions surrounding Martin Luther King, Jr.'s famous 1968 "I've Been to the Mountaintop" speech, given the day before his assassination in Memphis, Tennessee.

Here's my picks for tonight... Crystal's "Up to the Mountain"... Crystal's "Me and Bobby McGee"... Lee's "Beautiful Day"... Lee's "Everybody Hurts"... Lee's "The Boxer"... Crystal's "Black Velvet"

Peronsally, I think Crystal Bowersox wins this, and if she does, I will immediately purchase "Up to the Mountain (MLK Song)" by C'Bosox as soon as its available. 

And to wrap up, its Will Young, the winner of the UK's Pop Idol, and the guy who sings "Leave Right Now", the exit song for Idol this year is onstage singing that very song.   The Lovely Steph Leann and I debate on whether he's black or not.  I think he could be, she says no.

Tomorrow night at 8pm, join me here on Clouds as I give a running diary of the finals... why at 8?  Well, if I wait an hour, I can fast forward through commercials, the Ford Music Video, random performances we want to skip and so on. 

100 Coolest Things of 2009... #30 to 21

Continuing our list of the absolute 100 coolest things of all 2009...

The 30th Coolest Thing of 2009... Tyler Gets Woked Up
See, now would be a good time to, if you are on Facebook, click over to Clouds in My Coffee so you can see this video.  Its absolutely out of your mind hysterical.  That's Tyler, my brother in law, as the main victim of this senseless travesty of sleep deprivation.



By the way, they set up the entire drumset in the bedroom, all while Tyler was completely asleep.  If there's one thing I've learned from The Lovely Steph Leann, its that those Campbells can sleep anywhere and through anything.

The 29th Coolest Thing of 2009... "The Hangover"
In a post entitled "Not Emmy Turnbow Safe" from June 27th, 2009, I explain quite simply at how this movie is... well, not Emmy Turnbow safe. 

From that post:  Simple premise is, three guys take their buddy for a night stay in Vegas for a bachelor party… all three have distinctly different personalities, all three are played to the hilt, and all three react differently when they wake up in their now-trashed hotel room the next morning, a tiger in the bathroom, a baby in the closet, one guy missing a tooth and the groom completely disappeared. None of them can remember a thing about the night, but they start backtracking their steps to find out what happened, and why Mike Tyson ends up in their hotel room. And where the tiger came from. And why one of them is missing a tooth. And why there is a baby in the closet. And why... come to think of it, this sounds like The Lovely Steph Leann's bachelorette party.

This movie had me rolling... I'm not proud of saying that, but there it is. 

The 28th Coolest Thing of 2009... "The Hurt Locker"
From December 7th, where you can also read about what might be the greatest year in film history... "The Hurt Locker" is about a group of solders in Iraq that disarm Improvised Explosive Devices, or IEDs, which are really just like they sound--simply made bombs that are triggered by tripwires, or remotes or whatever, made to kill people, namely American soliders.

There are three main reasons why I thought this film was brilliant... first, the lack of superstars helps this movie quite a bit.  Jeremy Renner, Anthony Mackie and Brian Geraghty have been in other stuff, but you likely won't remember much of it. Taking away this stardom almost makes this feel like its a documentary more than anything else, like what you are seeing on screen is actually happening 5,000 miles and a half-dozen time zones away--maybe because it is.

Secondly, its not preachy. Anyone who has read this site enough will know I'm not into being preached at by films that are supposed to entertain. It doesn't dive into politics, into why we are there, why we are or are not winning or losing the war, or anything else. It just tells its story.

Finally... its just a really good movie. Its a movie about war, so none of the language is Emmy Turnbow Safe, and it does have its bloody moments, but its paced well, it doesn't veer into subplots (much... there is one small one, but it resolves itself quickly) and after its over, you just nod your head and say, "That's a good movie."

The 27th Coolest Thing of 2009... Rebecca Jourdan Samuelson
I think I've told this story before, but I'll tell it again as a reminder.  Back in 1998, I moved to Birmingham.  Back in 1998, I didn't have alot of... well, I really didn't have any friends.  I had begun attending Valleydale Church (an sbc fellowship) and had a few people here and there I had met.  People that, in a dire emergency, I'm sure I could have called upon and expected an answer, though probably more out of Christian fellowshippy obligation than loyalty to me.

Back in October of '98, I worked at Parisian Corporate, back when Parisian still existed and was owned by Saks Fifth Avenue.  Back then, they owned McRae's, Bergners, Yonkers and a few other places, and were a booming department store chain.  Anyway, I worked in the Home Department buying office at the time, and this chick I had met at church was working a few departments down.  Rebecca Jourdan.  We struck up an unlikely friendship, and she, for lack of a better word, "took me under her wing", almost becoming this Big Sister type that I needed.

When my car broke down--and this happened alot--she would drive from Cahaba Heights to Lorna Road (no, not GuadalaHoover, it was closer to the 65 side) to pick me up.  We shared a meal or two, and she'd always buy.  I got behind on rent, she gathered the Sunday School class she'd invited me to, and gotten me to attend, and collected enough money to pay my rent once. 

She was my friend, and I hers.  She even drove me to and from the dentist when I got my wisdom teeth pulled... I think in my possible delirium of being high on Novacaine (or whatever they use) I told her I loved her... or maybe that she loved me... or that I was hungry... or who knows. I was drooling.  And she walked me and helped me pass out on the couch--helping you walk to a couch while your mouth is full of cotton and your shirt is soaked with dripping saliva is a sign of a true friend.

Time went by, and she got closer to the guy she was seeing... and she married... and then moved to Mississippi.  It wasn't like she just up and left and didn't tell anyone, but in a way, that's kind of what happened.  By that time, I had met the guys who would eventually join me in The Deuce, had gotten more involved in Valleydale Church (an sbc fellowship) and our friendship, at least for that season, had kind of run its course. 

Through the years, I asked a few people that knew both of us what had happened to Rebecca... and always got the same answer:  "I dunno".  But one day, the same thing that has happened to a thousand people across the country happened to me--I found her on Facebook.  And emailed her immediately.  She emailed back, and we had re-connected.  We agreed to meet for lunch at Roly Poly, a place I'm not a huge fan of, but if Rebecca had said, "Meet me for lunch at the Dog Poop Cafe", I'd had been there.

I saw her, gave her a huge, huge, huuuuge hug and was so happy I had my friend back.  We chatted over lunch and I was able to tell her truly how God had used her my life,  We talk back and forth every now and again, but I know how to find her now, which I didn't for something like 8 years... thanks Rebecca.  You truly are an angel.

The 26th Coolest Thing of 2009... "My Live Would Suck Without U"
Leave it to Kelly Clarkson to toss out a tune that blows me away.  Not only was she was the 6th coolest thing of 2005, but her song "Behind These Hazel Eyes" was the 25th coolest thing of that same year. 

And this year, she releases a song from her fourth album, "All I Ever Wanted"... and its loud, its booming, its up tempo and its so easy to sing when you are driving 85 down the interstate... "becaaaaause we beeeelooooong tooooogeeethaaaaa now, yeah, forever uniiiiiiiited here somehow, yeah... you got a piece of me... and honestly... my life (MY LIFE!) would suck (WOULD SUCK!) without you...!!!"

Be honest.  You are singing it now, aren't ya?   And like 2005, Kelly Clarkson has the... second... coolest song of the year.

The 25th Coolest Thing of 2009... David & Amanda Tuck
One of the things that The Lovely Steph Leann and I do alot, perhaps well, is socialize.  We love meeting new people and we love "double dates" with othe couples.  We've reached out and established great relationships with people like KT & J Rob (though sadly we don't get to see them nearly as much as we used to, since they moved 42 miles out of town).

We were all in one big class, led by Emmy Turnbow and her hubby Jason, and we ended up meeting David and Amanda Tuck, this 20something couple that hadn't been married too long.  He's kinda country, she's kinda country, they are both down to earth fun people.  You know those kind of couples that are so darn cute, its almost irritating, but you can't be irritated with them at all because they not only are cute, they are so darn sweet?  Yeah, thats the Tucks.

Well, the class got really big... and at one point, the class split like some church classes do.  We moved to the new class, the Tucks remained, so like some other couples that we enjoy (back to KT and J Rob again), we only see them in passing at church... though when we do see them, great hugs and big handshakes ensue.

The Tucks are on our list of couples to spend more time with.   

The 24th Coolest Thing of 2009... Disney With the Family
One of the benefits of The Happiest Place in the Mall is the Most Magical Benefits on Earth.  That means as a cast member, I get to go to Disney World for free... well, free admission, and half-off on stays at the resorts.  One of our great joys is to be able to take people with us as well, and last September, we were able to take The Lovely Steph Leann's sister Angie, and Nephew Benny and Niece Maddie.

As many trips as I have taken to Disney World, I don't end up talking a whole lot about them on the blog, mostly because it might be the same ol, same ol after a while... we rode this, we rode that, we ate here, it was good, and so on.  Much like a billion pictures on Facebook all kind of run together.

This was a special trip, though, because in taking the Sis and kids, we were able to take with us a family that wouldn't normally be able to go, mostly because of the cost.  Let's face it, if it weren't for the benefits of the job, The Lovely Steph Leann and I would only go once a year, maybe once per 18 month period. 

You should check out the trip report, though, from September 27th, called "T-Rex Tired", if for no other reason than to read about an exasperated mother of two do battle with an incomptent waitress...  I wrote:  In case you were wondering, yes we did leave her a tip, which flew in the face of everything I believe in when it comes to tipping. Why? Maybe I felt bad for her. Hell hath no fury like a exhausted, weary, fatigued mom of two exhausted, weary, fatigued, fussy children under 12 who just wants quesadillas with meat and cheese on them. I think that's in Proverbs.

The 23rd Coolest Thing of 2009... Justin Fisher
This guy is just awesome.  First time I remember having a conversation with him, though we might have spoken in passing previous to this, was about the first time I had a real conversation with Hurricane Rhett. 

Several years back, at the wedding of Rad-a-Tad Roose and his wife Gina, The Lovely Steph Leann and I were sitting at a downstairs table at the reception, along with Hurrican Rhett and his wife, Amarylis By Morning (up from San Antone) and JustFish, with his wife Kelly.  The conversation went something like this.

Me: I like that dress (referring to Amarylis By Morning (up from San Antone))
Hurricane Rhett:  I like it too.  Though I like it better when its draped over my headboard.
JustFish (looking at his own wife): Agreed.

Through that exchange, I knew I had found some guys I could relate to. 

JustFish is one of the leaders of our Sunday School Life Connection class that I referred to earlier when discussing The Tucks, and not to slight the other guys that lead, but JustFish is pretty amazing when he's teaching.  He's a teacher of economics by profession (when I want to know some law stuff, I talk to the Clouds in My Coffee Ombudsman Brad Latta... when I want some economic stuff, I go to JustFish) so he's got the lecture skills down. 

He's got a brilliant spiritual mind and is one of those approachable guys you feel like you could sit with and chit chat about light stuff like, "So, pre-destination?  Was I ordained to ask that?" or "Revelation. We win.  But how?"

Anyway, 2009 was really the year I got to know this guy fully, and am pleased and proud to call him my friend. 

The 22nd Coolest Thing of 2009... "It" by Stephen King
I read this book when I was about 15 years old.  "It" was released in 1986, and was a behemoth of a book to tackle.  I vaguely remember it taking me a good week or two to finish it, but I do remember devouring it.  It was a good 1000+ pages, had a ton of characters, but it had something that I liked in books... kids that were close to my age, and I was able to relate.

"It" is the story of a group of kids in the 50s, dubbed "The Losers Club" for their outcast status, who confront a monster, and evil entity that has suddenly (re)awakened under the town of Derry, Maine.  The book also parallels the same kids as grown ups in the 80s, scattered across the globe, all being drawn back to Derry because of the promise they'd make--if it came back, they would too.  And It does.  And they do.  And it has one of the scariest interpretations of a clown, ever.  Pennywise.  Not a fan.  Well, "It" is more of a spirit being, but the clown is the form it takes... I'm sure that makes you feel better.

There's a good lesson to be learned here--never trust anyone who lives in a sewer, especially if its a clown. 

They made a mini-series in 1990, starring John Boy, Jack Tripper, Judge Harry Stone and Seth Green, among others, and if you ever watch it, just remember the first part is awesome, the second part not so much.  Tim Curry plays Pennywise, though, and he, pardon the pun, kills it. 

The Lovely Steph Leann had purchased a hardcover copy of the book for Christmas one year, a gift that I was very pleased with.  The problem was, this book is huge... and heavy.  So I went out and bought a paperback copy of it, one that I could bend up a little, and wouldn't mind if it was a little ragged after I was done.  And I dove right in... and realized how much I had forgotten in the almost 20 years it had been since I'd read "It". 

Because my time is so limited for just sitting and reading, it was hard to get through quickly--it took a month.  I would read the paperback at work, or on the road (I finished in in June, on the way to Disney World while sitting in the passenger seat of St'ray's SUV), but while at home, I would pick up the hardcover, find where I left off and get through a chapter or two before going to sleep. 

"It" is brilliant.  The book tells the story of the kids in the 50s and adults in the 80s side-by-side, one chapter happening then, another happening now.  You gain real empathy for the heroes in the story, while you really hate the bad guys, which go beyond just a creepy clown... and unlike the mini-series, the ending of the book is satisfying, if not making you feel like it ended where it should, without carrying on a little too far. 

There are a select number of books that are consider "masterpieces" by Stephen King--one would be "The Stand", almost a magnus opus.  Another would be "The Dark Tower", though thats a series of seven books that I've heard are both awesome and uneven.  "The Shining" and "'Salem's Lot" are also considered with high regard as early novels.  But there are many books I've flipped through that discuss Kings work, and almost all of them consider "It" to be his overall best work. 

Me?  I considered this to be my favorite of King's work... and still do, though admittedly, having read "'Salem's Lot" three times in three years, its getting close.

(oh, and after I finished writing this post, I was adding links, and I found out that "It" is coming to audiobook in May.  Who's excited?  MeMeMe!!!)

The 21st Coolest Thing of 2009... The Gators Win the Title
Go Gators!  Go Gators!  Go Gators!  Go Gators!  Go Gators!!

Coming up... my favorite blog of the year... my favorite podcast of the year... my favorite Starbucks manager of the year... my favorite book of the year... and more...

Creed On Idol? And Other Strange Idol Notes...

It's late game, the results are actually going on right now, and as I type this, its 724p on Thursday, and I would imagine that at least one Idol has been kicked off the show.  But I don't know who.  I won't know who... until later tonight... because, by virtue of DVR...

THIS IS AMERICAN

IDOL

Last night, the dudes were onstage, tonight its the chicks... they were supposed to be on last night, but for some unknown reason, Crystal Bowersox was taken to the hospital and told by her doctors to not perform for a night... so, with Idol being the kind, generous folks they are, plus the fact that C'Bosox is one of their early-on favorites, they switched nights (c'mon... do you really think if it had been Ashley Rodriguez who got sick that they would have flipped things around?  Exactly)

So, for tonight, we are going to squeeze in Idol, plus the results show, plus Survivor, and, oh yeah, I have to pack, because while its 7:33p right now (The Lovely Steph Leann, who has already seen both performance shows, had just come in for something... want to mention that in case you think "wow, 9 minutes to type a single paragraph?"), in about 8 hours, I'll be starting up the car to head to Lake Buena Vista, Florida. 

Right off the top, they bring out C'Bosox, without explanation of why she was sick or what happened.  Obviously, she's better.  Here's a question... why am I so drawn to Kara the New Hotness?  I mean, really... perhaps its her sitting next to America's Favorite Lesbian Ellen, sort of like how a blind person has all their other senses more aware, perhaps a lack of Hotness on the judges panel raises Kara the New Hotness' beauty scale.  Sort of like the saying, wanna look skinny, hang out with fat people.  Anyway...

C'Bosox is up first, and her video tells us all about having a twin brother.  I'm assuming he's not identical.  And am I the only one who thinks she has weird teeth?  I mean, we jumped all over Elliott Yah-mean a few seasons ago for this jacked up grill, but are we afraid to admit that C'Bosox has got some funky dental issues?  Just sayin'.

She's doing some CCR, and while last week, she sounded like a good cover artist on Alanis, this week she sounds like a good cover artist on CCR.  I thought it was kinda bluesy, I thought it was cool... Crystal Bowersox did a cool, cool performance.  Rock on.  Randy the Dawg, Ellen DeG, Kara the New Hotness and Simon the Cowell all loved it.

Haeley Vaughn... she's going to be singing Miley Cyrus.  One can only hope she doesn't take on "Party in the USA".  No, no, its "The Climb".  Okay, so is it racist to make fun of the way she looks, just because she's black?  I made fun of C'Bosox, so screw it... I'm not entirely convinced her lips actually come together.  Like, they flashed to her and her mouth was closed, but that may have been digitally enhanced, or she just worked really hard to get it done.  And a few seconds later, they snapped back open.

Didn't like the song when it came out, didn't like it when I heard it every hour, 8 hours a day, five to six days per week, for six months.  Didn't like it when the movie came out and Miley sang it (though Billy Ray Cyrus doing that finger-point thing was the highlight and almost worth a viewing... almost).  And I don't like the song now, especially when Haeley Vaughn is singing it.  The Lovely Steph Leann walked in, heard part of it, and said, "Wow, its worse than it was last night..."

Randy the Dawg didn't like it.  Ellen DeG didn't like it.   Kara the New Hotness tells her that people are rooting for her (who?  I don't know anyone who likes her!).  Then she tells Haeley that she needs another year of voice training... which is crappy, because Angela Martin could be sitting/singing here tonight, while Haeley awaits her turn next year.

By the way, you know you are old when Billy Ray Cyrus is no longer Billy "Achy Breaky" Ray Cyrus, he's just Miley's dad. 

I think that I view Lacey Brown kinda like Democrats view He Who Must Not Be Re-Elected... so young, so brilliant, so full of promise, so much potential.  And epic, epic fail.  I mean big fail.  Falling on your face fail.   At least Lacey is kinda cute. 

Tonight, after Kara the New Hotness' recommendation, she's taking on "Kiss Me" by Sixpence None the Richer.  Man, I loved me some Sixpence back in the day.  And right from the first note, I can tell you that Lacey is NOT Leigh Nash.  By the way, Leigh Nash's first album ranked as the 30th cool thing of 2006... and its even better years later. 

And the song is over, which is what I was stalling for.  It wasn't very good.  It just wasn't.  I wanted it to be, I wanted to be all about some Lacey Brown... Randy the Dawg agreed with me, Ellen DeG liked the song, Kara the New Hotness liked the first half of the song, and Simon the Cowell says it was better than last week, marginally.

Unlike He Who Must Not Be Re-Elected, I want to give Lacey Brown one more chance.  Lacey, I'm in your corner.  And if not, we can vote you out.  Just like He Who Must Not Re-Elected.  Yes we can!

Here comes Katie Stevens, perhaps the most boring Idol name since John Stevens.  And her video shows that... well, she's annoying, but it also shows that she's 17 years old.  She's doing Corinne Bailey Rae, "Put Your Records On".  She might be kind of annoying, but she's a fun annoying.

The song is not bad.  I mean, its not Corinne Bailey Rae, who is pretty darn good, but for a white girl, its a decent version.  Randy the Dawg says, "Yo, so yo, man, dawg, yo, so yo, work it out, yo, man you worked it out, yo dawg" or something to that effect.  Re: he liked it.  Ellen DeG says she has a great voice but wanted more.  Kara the New Hotness tells her she's frustrated, wanting even more from Katie.  Simon the Cowell is also frustrated.

Now, its Didi Benami, who kinda has a My Former Next American Idol Brooke White look about her.  That's a good thing, because I thought My Former Next American Idol Brooke White was a cutie-patootie. (Did I just say "cutie-patootie"?  I'm channeling my inner America's Former Favorite Lesbian Rosie O'Donnell...). 

"Lean on Me" by Bill Withers, and I have a feeling this isn't going to go well.  It never does with this song unless your name is actually Bill Withers, or maybe dcTalk, from the "Free at Last" album, which rocks. 

She's hitting the high, loud notes, and sounds okay, but really, I liked Ingrid Michaelsen's "The Way I Am" much better last week.   Randy the Dawg didn't like the song choice either.  Ellen DeG loves her voice, and her smile and her energy, but didn't like the song.  Kara the New Hotness just flat out says, "Didi... it wasn't good.  It just wasn't good."  Slap up by KTNH... wow.  Simon the Cowell says it was all over the place, screechy and a bad song...

Seacrest comes up to tell her numbers, and Didi keeps smiling... though she's holding her tears back through force, you can tell.  The Lovely Steph Leann actually just went on a rant... "What did you think?  I thought it was pretty good!  I mean, they trashed her!  Like, she was in key, she knew the words, she made it good... I don't get it.  I mean, she wasn't brilliant or anything, but she was a whole lot better than Haeley Vaughn!"  She throws her arms in disgust, "What do they want?!" and goes into the kitchen.  That was kind of fun.

Michelle My Belle is doing... Creed?  CREED?   Holy crap!  Creed?  Creed?  Like, Scott Stapp?  "With Arms Wide Open"?  This is either going to be awesome or a total piece of crap... seldom has The McGriddle Effect had potential on an Idol's performance.  This is historic.

Creed.  Has there ever been a band that was so beloved and popular for a time only to be such a punchline now?  No, besides boy bands, I mean.  Even then, at least Joey McIntyre, Jordan Knight and Timberlake had careers beyond their bands...

Personally, I thought the original was atrocious, and the video was even worse, with Stapp standing on this Irish bluff, singing with... well, arms wide open.  That means that a crying bucket of puppies would sound better than the original, and luckily for me, Michelle My Belle is making the song good.   Great.  That was just great.  The best looking Idol of the season has done the best job of the night...

Randy the Dawg didn't like it, saying "I thought you'd do more with it", making The Wrong Jermaine want to poke sticks in his eyes thinking of what he could have done with it.  Ellen DeG liked the song.  Kara the New Hotness loved it.  Yeah, Kara the New Hotness!  She even says "You almost made the song unrecognizable, which was so cool..." Poor Jermaine Sellers.  Simon the Cowell agrees with Kara the New Hotness, even saying "We do give a lot of contradictory advice..."

Lillyscott comes up next, doing Sam Cooke's "A Change is Gonna Come", another very, very risky tune.  She's wearing a shirt that reminds me of a purse that Lil Sister Ashley would use.   As she sings, she almost does the John Mayer "I'm gonna french the mic" singing style, and though the song is extremely hard to do, she's doing it proper justice. 

Despite my own proclivities, I like Lillyscott.  Can't help it.  Randy the Dawg loved it.  Ellen DeG says she has "it".  Kara the New Hotness says she had a "moment".  Simon the Cowell says it was good. 

Katelyn Epperly heard me discussing last week my fondness for Michelle My Belle, and it looks like she's dressed up to compete.  K-Ep looks... well, let's be honest, hot.  That dot in her forehead is kinda weird, but still.  She's singing Coldplay.  Coldplay? 

Okay, fine, Coldplay.  Its "The Scientist" on... piano.  Piano? 

Well, here she is... and she is awesome.  Like, seriously awesome.  And finally, finally, we have our first nomination for My Next American Idol.  Listen, looks have nothing to do with it... last year, My Former Next American Idol was Allison Iraheta, so looks really, really have nothing to do with it... but K-Ep just did a fantastic performance.  She was awesome... sounded great.

Randy liked it.  Ellen DeG says she kinda got sleepy.  Kara the New Hotness says she kinda loves her.  And even winks.  Simon the Cowell says it was a smart choice of song, but must be cautious to not be corny.  Personally, my favorite song of the night.

Paige Miles is kinda like John Park... I have no problem with them.  But they haven't won me over at all.  But I'm willing to give her a chance.  So, Paige, impress me.

Tonight she's singing "Walk Away" by Kelly Clarkson.  Okay, Paige, impress me.

And you know what?  She did.  That was great.  Oh, don't get me wrong, Paige is going to have to go a long way to even think about being d$'s Next American Idol, but its a start.

Randy the Dawg didn't love it, but liked it alot.  Ellen the Lesbian loved it.  Kara the New Hotness, who actually wrote the song, says that the song was written angry, so she should have played into that.  Simon the Cowell liked it, but is afraid she didn't choose the right song. 

And finally, Siobhan Magnus.  Amarylis by Morning (up from San Antone) loved this chick last week, even borderline chiding me for not loving her as much.  This week, she--that being Siobhan, though I'm sure Amarylis by Morning (up from San Antone) could do it just as well--is doing Aretha's "Think". 

The song is such a black diva song that its just weird when I see a skinny white girl do it.  It almost loses something.  And here, it feels like it loses something.  Well, it did until she hit that note at the end and the rafters almost came down... that was a heckuva note, in a good way.

Randy the Dawg says she picked the "dopest, coolest song" and then says, "it was dope!".  Ellen DeG just made a Snuggie joke, which made me laugh at her jokes for the first time this year.  Kara the New Hotness says she can't get over that note.  Simon the Cowell says there were parts of the note that were terrible, but that last note was incredible. 

Here's how it breaks down for me tonight... Katelyn Epperly... Michelle My Belle... C'Bosox... Siobhan Magnus... Paige Miles... Lillyscott... Didi Benami... Katie Stevens... Lacey Brown... Haeley Vaughn

So, if I'm picking the Chick Six right now, I'm easily taking K-Ep, Michelle My Bell, C'Bosox and Lillyscott.  I'm probably taking Didi Benami, and though its a toss up between Siobhan and Paige, I'm going Siobhan tonight, if only to not get chided by Amarylis by Morning (up from San Antone).

More Timberlake, More Musical Fun, More Videos of the Decade

By the way, I'm 2 people shy of the 100 Mark on the Clouds in My Coffee Facebook Group. Have you signed up?

By the way (part 2), if you are actually reading this on Facebook, you'll want to go to the original Clouds in My Coffee website, because videos don't show up on Facebook.

Alrighty... we're doing the Clouds Countdown on my favorite videos of the decade, and just a recap, #20 was "Fallin' For You" by Colbie Caillat, #19 was a tie between "Without You" by Eminem & "Stand Up" by Ludacris, #18 was "What Goes Around ... / ... Comes Around" by Justin Timberlake, #17 is "The Story" by Brandi Carlile and #16 was "Say It Right" by Nelly Furtado. See #20 here, and see #19 to #16 by clicking here.

At #15, its what I consider Part I (with "What Goes Around... /... Comes Around" being Part 2) of the best video "Forget You!" combo of all time. To Britney, Justin says, "Hey. Check it. You're absolutely nuts. People think you are a freak show. Me? I'm not only loaded, chicks dig me like crazy--heck, K-Dub loves me more than she loves her sister--and even though I was in a boy band, I'm still FRIGGIN COOL!!!"

Probably not Emmy Turnbow Safe, here's "Cry Me a River" by Justin Timberlake.



Here's a video that perhaps I like just as much for the song as I do the video--the song, after all, was #24th in the 100 Coolest Things of 2005... I like the video because its aggressive, its passionate and Kelly Clarkson simply throws down in a wedding dress.

My 14th favorite video of the decade is "Behind These Hazel Eyes" by Kelly Clarkson--once again, unavailable to post here, so click here for the YouTube link to the video.

Here's one I discovered sometime last year, from a song I discovered sometime last year. I've grown to appreciate Jason Mraz over the last couple of years both as a singer and a songwriter--for anyone who can actually sing successfully the second verse to "The Remedy", I commend you.

My vote for my 13th favorite video of the decade is "You and I Both" by Jason Mraz. Its a fun, light song and a silly video with bank tellers and managers dancing around, and somehow, Mraz getting arrested at the end, yet its still a hoot. Enjoy.



And finally, for this post, here's my 12th favorite video of the decade, from one of my favorite hip-hop songs of all time...



This one actually might be Emmy Turnbow Safe, with a few exceptions. Anyway, I love the song, and I love the story the video tells, Kelly Rowland is by far and away the hottest of the Destiny's Children and the whole thing is done great.

Hot Sister Cheney Meets Hootie

Help me get to 100 fans... search "Clouds In My Coffee" on Facebook, and become a fan! Its easy! Its free! Its the right thing to do.

Finally... a week and a half of promising, I'll deliver the new music on Clouds in My Coffee. Its always hard not just doing the same songs over and over, cause frankly, I know what I like. I'm a repetitive person, to a point--like, I'll eat the same cereal over and over for two or three months, then after that, I don't want cereal for six months.

Music is like that with me. I have my famous "Hannah Pruitt" playlist (the story of that name is listed in a previous post) which gets changed out every month... artists should consider it an honor to get on this list, as these are songs--new and old--that I will listen to over and over for weeks on end. Then, I'll punt them out of the list. All of the following songs are from this current edition of Hannah Pruitt.

"You're So Vain" by Carly Simon... this stays on the website. It just does. Get over it.

"You Belong With Me" by Taylor Swift... my current favorite song of the year, and should rank quite highly in the Coolest Things of 2009. I think what makes this song for me, though, is the video. Unfortunately, for some unknown copyright reason, its hard to find. But me, being as awesome as I am, have it here...




I think they'd give special permission to have it appear here on Clouds in My Coffee. Right? Right.

"Good Intentions" by Toad the Wet Sprocket... You know where I found this song? On the FRIENDS Soundtrack CD, one of the first five CDs I've ever purchased. I remember its also from 1995... because back then, I was going out with Julie Haynes, and I made her a couple of mix tapes with my favorite songs of that year, and this was my 2nd favorite song of 1995. The first? "Dreamlover" by Mariah Carey. Or was it "Fantasy"? Either one.

"Love Song" by Sara Bareilles... She gets the award for the last name thats hardest to remember how to spell. I've written a post that I haven't put up here yet (until just a few minutes ago, I think I forgot I had it) and its basically how to dissect a Romantic Comedy. I think I need to add one more step... when you make the trailer, you need to put this song over it. Why not? 104 other Rom Coms do it. By the way, I think I've heard this song so much, I've tried to get tired of it... and I can't. Love it.

"Just Started Lovin' You" by James Otto... This should have been on the Coolest Things of 2008, but I didn't know the name of it, nor who sang it, so I had no point of reference other than "that cool country song where the guy sings like this and..." I plan on putting it on the end of this year's list, with an honorable mention, a la "Bourne Ultimatum".

"Steel Bars" by Michael Bolton... Sigh. That's fine. Laugh. Make fun of me. I don't care. I dig this song. Heck, I dig Michael Bolton, puffy Kenny G hair and all. This song is cool. Okay, maybe "cool" is not the right word, but seriously, from 1988 to 1996, he had one heck of an 8 year run.

"Running From an Angel" by Hootie & the Blowfish... my favorite song from one of my all time favorite CDs, "Cracked Rear View". I was riding with Hootie with Hot Sista' Cheney (another name with a story, lest you think Chris Hansen and I are BFF) recently, and I took a gander at her iPod. I think a person's iPod can tell you as much about them as just about anything else (unless you've got 10,000 songs on it, like mine, in which you would probably deduce I'm either OCD or bipolar... or maybe ADOS... you know, Attention Deficit... Ooh, Shiny!) and I saw that she only had two or three Hootie songs on it. She's a bit younger than I, so naturally, why would she have more than "Let Her Cry" and "Hold My Hand"?

That's the problem with today's younglings... all they care about is Eminem and Lady GaGa and anything with a beat that talks about the po-po and smackin' up my beeyotch and so on and so forth. I would love a radio station that played some good 90s stuff. Sheryl Crow, Boyz II Men, pre-skank Mariah, pre-crack Whitney, even early pre-crazy Britney Spears would be fine. Am I the only one? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!

Anyway, in our conversation, we discussed how she needed to learn more Hootie, and for that matter, early, good Sheryl Crow. Before she went all "use one piece of toilet paper" crazy enviromental.

So sayeth Sheryl: "I propose a limitation be put on how many sqares [sic] of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required. When presenting this idea to my younger brother, who's judgement [sic] I trust implicitly, he proposed taking it one step further. I believe his quote was, "how bout just washing the one square out."

Later she said she was kidding. I'm not sure I fully believe that she was kidding.



Found these two magazine covers online... Sister Cheney, meet Hootie. Hootie, Paige.

Anyway, I ended up making Hot Sista' Cheney a couple of CDs, one being Hootie's entire "Cracked Rear View" album and a few songs from "Fairweather Johnson" and "Musical Chairs, and other with Sheryl Crow, most of her great stuff from the first several excellent albums, with emphasis on "The Globe Sessions", one of my favorite CDs.

Where was I?

"My Life Would Suck Without You" by Kelly Clarkson... This song makes a 2nd month appearance on the list. I don't dig all of her stuff, some of it is really silly and monotonous... but what I do enjoy, I really enjoy. Her song "Behind These Hazel Eyes" made the Top 100 (#25) in 2005, where she herself ended up the 6th Coolest Thing of that year. And this song? Bound for the Top 20, perhaps even a Top 10 appearance, if not for the emergance of "You Belong With Me", as listed above. Kelly and Taylor, slug it out. I knew a girl named Kelly Taylor once. She was pretty.

"Hard Luck Woman" by Garth Brooks... This was featured on the KISS tribute album entitled "KISS My A$$", which though the use of "$" doesn't disguise the words true intentions, its still a comical and clever title anyway. Garth doesn't sound like Garth here, but he does sound awesome. I actually, and this might be sacrelige to some, like this better than the original.

"Dream Lover" by Mariah Carey... I've often lamented my sorrow at how Mariah has turned into a string wearing punchline. She used to be so great, when every song didn't have a subtitle of "(featuring T-Pain)" or "(featuring Common)" or "(feat. insert stupid common word or acronym based rapper gangsta name that will forgotten in a year other than bloggers using it as a joke here)". But I digress. I was tempted to post a few pictures of Mariah, one from 1994 and one from last year, but any picture of Mariah in the last few years is bound to not be Emmy Turnbow safe.

"Motownphilly" by Boyz II Men... This song never gets old. However, I'm sure there aren't many below, say, 28 years old who will understand the line "A-B-C, BBD, the East Coast Family..." in this song.

"I Guess the Lord Must Be in New York City", by Harry Nilsson... Finally, this song is available on playlist.com, where is where I pull my playlist from. I tried to link to it before, and wasn't able to so do, but viola! Here it is. One of the classic 70's Songwriter's Tunes, its also featured in one of my top 15 movies in The Dave100.

"Basic Instructions" by Burlap to Cashmere... This is the album version, I believe, and still a great song. The better one, though, is the live version from "Live at the Bitter End", a five song EP released shortly after their first (and only?) album... it might not have been their only album, but it was really the only one with any relevance. The live version is a brilliant driving song, wedged in between "La Grange" and "Everything Zen" on my driving playlist. By the way, it took stupid me forever to figure out the "Basic instructions before leaving Earth" reference.

"Fingerprints of God" by Steven Curtis Chapman... Its underrated. But awesome. Simply fantastic. One of those "Let me sit back, listen and remember and praise how awesome God is." Well, those were the words I used to describe "Speechless", which was originally on here... however, even though it stays "Speechless", it plays "Fingerprints of God". Which is great too, so we'll go with it.

And thats our new list. You like it? Tell me what you think.