Everybody's Free to Have a Quiet Time

So, sometimes when I am looking for something blog and I know I have to not only be up in about 7 hours for work, meaning I'll need to be in bed in an hour or so... and so tonight, I found this little gem.  Well, to me its a gem, to you it might just be something to skim on your daily check of Clouds in My Coffee

...which I've noticed I'm getting alot of traffic daily, probably due to The Summer of Blogging--so... thank you so much...

...anyway, its the lyrics to a version of "Everyone's Free to Wear Sunscreen", done by Baz Luhrmann from 1999. 

It originated in 1997, when Mary Schmich of the Chicago Tribune wrote a column entitled "Advice, Like Youth, Probably Just Wasted on the Young".  She described it as "a commencement speech, were I asked to give one".   Over the years, it has been erroneously attributed to Kurt Vonnegat, though it became truly famous when, in 1999, Australian film director Baz Luhrmann used the entire essay in a spoken word song entitled "Wear Sunscreen". 

And by 2000, this song was everywhere.  So, on January 9th, 2001, I did my own version.  And I thought I'd give it to you...

"HAVE A QUIET TIME (EVERYBODY'S FREE)"

Ladies and gentlemen of The Deuce... read scripture.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, a daily quiet time would be it.  The long term benefits of The Word has been proven time after time by God and joy in your life that comes with Him, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.

I will dispense this advice...

...now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of The Deuce.  Oh, never mind, you will never understand the power and beauty of The Deuce until it has disbanded.   But trust me, in twenty years, you will look back at photos of Deuce Christmas and an old DeuceFest shirt and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much fun you had and how fabulous the Deuce guys really looked.

They are not as lazy as you might think.

Don't worry about the future or worry, but know that worrying is as ineffective as McLeod trying to be entertained by watching Jason Takes Manhatten.  The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that has a Mercedes blindsiding your insuranceless car at 10:30pm on a random Tuesday.

Bring one new person to Common Ground, even if it scares you.

If you are Stephanie Campbell, sing.  Unless you are Rebecca Glassco.  Then act.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with Delta Zetas who are reckless with yours.

Use coasters.

Don't waste your time on jealousy... if she likes you, great, if she doesn't, being jealous will only turn her off of you even further.  The race is long and though you may never reach the end, enjoy the run.

Remember compliments Michael gives you, forget his insults.  If you succeed in doing this, you aren't Sarah Hasha.

Keep your old movie tickets.  Throw away any bills.

Slam.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 20 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 25 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of Hamburger Helper.

Be kind to the Nipp family... you'll miss Sunday lunch when its gone.

Maybe you'll get a date, maybe you won't.  Maybe you'll go out twice, maybe you won't.  Maybe you'll go stag at Deuce Date Party, maybe you'll eat cheese fries on your 2nd anniversary.

Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, dont berate yourself to much either.

God's will is going to happen, whether you like it or not.

Enjoy the Deuce.  Visit every chance you can, don't be afraid of it or what other people think of it.  It has some of the greatest fellowship you'll ever know.

Watch the History Channel at least once a week, even if there are others things on.

Don't worry about the directions, just shove them behind the DVDS.

Do not read Shawn's Better Homes and Gardens, it will only make you feel gay.

Get to know Factor 7's music.  You'll never know when they'll break up for good.

Be nice to your roommates.  They are the best link to paying rent on time, and the people most likely to stick with you when everyone else won't.

Understand that friends come and go, but a precious few you should hold on to. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and gender, for as the older you get, the more you'll need somewhere to go and just relax.

Visit Hunter Street once, but leave before it makes you hard.

Visit Brookhills once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Accept certain inaliable truths... Daniel will have his palm pilot,  and Ty Coffey will own Samford and Mike Williams will try to date Rebecca.  When you get older, you'll fantacize that when you young, Daniel used an ink pen, Mike was meeting girls at Ropers and Ty was merely a Senator.

Respect Wookiee, Sybil and Jimmy, for they are your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to pay your bills.

Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a loaded roommate, but you'll never know when either one will run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you are 40 you will look like you are a minister at Valleydale.

Be careful where you buy your used cds and movies, but be patient with those who supply them. 

Know that advice is a form of nostalgia.  Dispensing it is a way of sharing your opinions without seeming like you are telling the other person what to do.  Usually its recycled advice spoken for more than its worth.

But trust me on the quiet time.

The Summer of Blogging Day Forty One

The 100 Coolest Things of 2010... #50 to 41

And we continue with the longest running list, not counting The Dave100, on this blog site... that being the 100 Coolest Things of 2010.  I won't bother with the recap just yet, you can find it to the right under archives...

50... Harry Finds a Hallow
After what I considered to be a disaster, though one I can still bear to watch, of the last movie (the post I wrote, by the way, "A Letter to Steve Kloves" is one of the most read posts on this here bloggy site), my expectations for "Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows Part I" were lower... but still slightly high, nonetheless.

Here's what I wrote on November 30th, 2010:

First and foremost, it holds a huge, huge advantage over any of the previous six films, and that is simply that this movie covers only half the book. The reason "Goblet of Fire" and "Order of the Phoenix" cut out almost half of their respective books is simply a time factor... you would have a six hour movie to cover everything ("Goblet of Fire" skipped the S.P.E.W. subplot, and was one of the few things I enjoyed about the movie versions over the books).

Essentially, the film version, at least Part I, of "The Deathly Hallows", is a little like a table of contents. You see a live action snippet of each scene that is fully fleshed out in the book itself, something is allowable because the 140 minutes of the movie covers only about 300 pages, not 500 pages.

You can read the full post here, but it continues to talk about the movie, first spoiler free, and then second, spoiler filled (though there are several alerts to tell you to stop reading if you haven't seen it).  I finished the post by saying, "Anyway, I really enjoyed the film, and have intentions on seeing it again. I said before my favorite movie character is Luna, but my favorite book character is Ginny Weasley... but I'm not sure I dig Bonnie Wright. I also think Fenrir Greybeck is fantastic in the book, but in the movie he's so marginalized and relegated to a second tier character.  Go see the movie, irregardless of whether you've read the book."

49... Via Napoli


Don't let the angle fool you.  This pizza is a monster, and this is taken
after four adults had just about had their fill...



What can I tell you about Epcot's newest restaurant?  Its in Italy, its authentic Italian, and its delicious.  I've eaten there twice, and its got some of the best pizza I've ever had, not to mention some of the best desserts I've eaten in a while.

Their food is a little pricey, but let's face it, its Disney, and all prices are a little higher than normal.  They ph-balance the water to match that of water found in Italy, as well as authenticate other ingredients to give you the freshest, purest form of Italian food... and their large pizza, $40 as it may be, will feed at least six people, if not more.  Its pretty awesome. 

48... Christians Like Stuff
So, Jon Acuff writes this blog, aptly titled Stuff Christians Like about being a Christian, and he asks tough questions like, what to do with the Christian version of "Freebird", or the problem with unrated movies on DVD... he's the author of several books, including one named after his website, and its a great read pretty much every day. 

47... Little Sister Ashley Gets a Ring
What can I say... my own adopted little sister (I got the looks in the family) got a ring on her finger from her hometown sweetheart, Brandon.  Apparently, he'd pined for her for years and years and years, and she gave him the cold shoulder... but one day, she woke up and said, "Whaaaa...?  I... like this guy!  No!  I love this guy!"



At top, its Brandon and Lil
Sister Ashley.  The bottom pic
features The Honorable Rev'rn
Ty "Sharpton" Coffey and Lori
Anne, bride to be.

 She stopped by my store and flashed the ring, then I immediately commanded her to go to The Cabana and show The Lovely Steph Leann, which she did. 

And this past May, we were able to attend the wedding, which I'm sure you'll read about in The 100 Coolest Things of 2011... at this rate, some time around September 2013. 

Which leads me to...

46... Ty Gives a Ring
Here's another engagement that rocks, and gets the slight edge over Little Sister Ashley's big moment if only because I was involved in the proceedings...  The Honorable Rev'rn Ty Sharpton called me up and asked if I would participate in his little engagement get-together, which involved me taking the ring from him and setting it up in Samford's chapel. 

It was a little intimidating, holding a ring that cost more than Toni Rocki Honda, my little car at the time.  He asked me to not open it, not to look at it, he wanted Lori Anne to be the next one to see it, and I obliged.  I was to place it on the podium of the chapel at a certain time, then hide when Rev'rn Ty and his bride-to-be, Lori Anne, came in. 

While I was waiting for the word from Ty, people came in and out of the chapel--Samford had a football game going on in the stadium across the street at the same time--and I sat off to the side in a pew, probably looking like an old creeper.  I held the ring box tightly until I got the text that said, "In chapel yard".  I was nervous about letting the ring leave my sight, but I put it on the podium then slipped out a side door.

I walked around the student break area until I finally got a text that said "ITS DONE"... upon my return, there was a big smile from Revr'n Ty, and a bigger smile from little Lori Anne, and the ring almost blinded me.   And I was also able to not just attend, but be a part of their wedding, which you'll probably see in The 100 Coolest Things of 2011 as well.

45... B.o.B. Professes His Love
By the summer of 2010, there weren't a ton of songs that had really piqued my interest, especially in hip-hop areas... cause really, they all kind of sound alike.  So, here comes "Nothin On You" by B.o.B. featuring Bruno Mars, with this profession of love for his boo, telling her that there are chicks all over the place, and that sure, they might be cute or he might say hello... but ain't none them ho's got nothin on you.  Nothing.

"Beautiful girls, all over the world, I could be chasin', but my time would be wasting, they got nothin on you baby (nuh nuh nuh nothin on you... nuh nuh nuh nothing on you)... they might say hi, I might say hey, but you shouldn't worry about what they say cause they got nothing on you, baby (nuh nuh nuh nothing on you... nuh nuh nuh nothing on you)... nothing on you baby..."

Keep in mind, this was the summer that both B.o.B. and Bruno Mars emerged, so I don't feel bad in telling you that for the longest time, I couldn't tell who was rapping and who was singing.  Perhaps I'm still not sure.

44... The Books Get Read
My love of audiobooks is well documented and deep, with probably 100 or more in my collection... I keep most of them, about 110 gbs worth, on an external portable hard drive, but on my iPod that I have with me about 97% of the waking hours of my day, I have at least 30 or 40 that I take with me, just in case I might want to jump into a random book, be it Kristen Chenoweth's biography (or Andre Agassi's) or maybe some Glenn Beck, or even a chick lit novel by Emily Giffen...

And then, I finally joined Audible dot com.  The way it works is, you pay one price per month and you are given "Credits".  Then, you can download audiobooks for a credit, or for larger audiobooks (like the Walt Disney biography I initially got, which was 35 hours--it was two credits, but I got it free for joining).  Every month, for $14.95, I get another credit...

Essentially, its buying an audiobook for $15 per month, but when you consider they are running anywhere from $25 to $50 per book, its a pretty good deal.  Also, for members, you get special discounts on books, sometimes half off, sometimes huge percentages off, sometimes free... I just downloaded "Go the Heck to Sleep" children's book (warning:  NOT Emmy Turnbow safe), narrated by Samuel L. Jackson, for no charge whatsoever...

And the selection is pretty great too.  I managed to get The Pixar Touch for less than $7, I got Patton Oswalt's comedic book for about $6 and downloaded "ESPN: Those Guys Have All the Fun" for May's selection for one single credit... regular price, $26. 

Randomly, just for thought, here's my current wish list, or, books I'll end up downloading or purchasing if they go cheap--in the order I'm going to get them:  "The Men Who Would Be King: An Almost Epic Tale of Moguls, Movies, and a Company Called Dreamworks" by Nicole LaPorte... "Decision Points" by Dubya... "Bossypants" by Tina Fey... "Without You: A Memoir of Love, Loss and the Musical Rent" by Anthony Rapp... "Your Only As Good As Your Next One: 100 Great Films, 100 Good Films and 100 Films For Which I Should Be Shot" by Michael Medavoy

And if you think this was just a reason to go all Ron Burgundy and say, "Hey everyone!  Come look at the cool stuff I've been reading!"... well, you may be right.  Though if anyone has thoughts on any of these books, then I'd love to hear them--besides the predictable recoil by Brad Latta, Atty at Law, at the mention of Glenn Beck or Dubya. 

43... A Dragon Gets Tamed
Here's what I wrote about "How To Train Your Dragon" on June 6th, 2010...

"How to Train Your Dragon" follows the story of Hiccup, who lives in a Viking village where the life of a Viking is to hung and kill dragons of every size--and they are aplenty in this movie. Hiccup is a loser that is made fun of by most of the clan, mostly because his heart is not into hunting anything, much less dragons, but to please his father--who happens to be village chief, no less--he does what he can.

Hiccup ends up taking down a rare Night Fury dragon, but upon finding it in the woods, cannot bring himself to finish him off... and there, the adventure takes flight, pun intended.

I loved it. I loved every single second of this movie. I loved the main character, Hiccup, I loved his love interest, a spry pixie named Astrid, I loved the dragons, including the main one nicknamed Toothless, I loved the setting, I loved the creativity, I loved the story... I thought this movie was brilliant. This was the first time I'd ever seen a non-Pixar animated movie and thought, "This should have been a Pixar film."

The Lovely Steph Leann loved it too. As the credits began to roll, she piped up and said, "Wow. DreamWorks finally got it right." (full review is found here)

By the way, I watched this movie a few days ago on cable... it is just as good, great even, as the first time I watched it.  And that is a true test of a good movie.

42... A Town Gets Covered
Wow this is a big book.  Perhaps Stephen King likes to release a 1000 page behemoth every year, or maybe I just tend to read one--in 2009, it was "It"... and in 2010, it was "Under the Dome".

In the fall of some year after 2012, Dale Barbara, known as "Barbie", is trying to leave the small town of Chester's Mill.  Before he can get very far, however, something odd happens.  An invisible, indestructible barrier--a dome, per se--is dropped over the town, keeping everyone who's out of town out of the town, and everyone who is in the town, in the town.

Big Jim Rennie, second selectman, takes over the town, appointing his corrupt friends and sick, twisted son Junior as town officials, and does his best to try and contain the opposition, which includes Barbie and newspaper editor Julia Shumway.   Slowly but surely, the town's government falls apart as Big Jim's rule becomes more and more stern, and as his ego--and paranoia of losing control--spiral out of control.

Efforts to destroy the Dome fail one after the other, and everything from civility to law to just common sense begins to fall apart, piece by piece, little by little... its not a slippery slope so much as a straight up and down cliff. 

While the Dome is the central key to the novel, it is what happens to the town that becomes the book's plot.  The breakdown in civilization, the loss of respect and democracy... that's the book's central storyline.  When Big Jim realizes that not everyone sees it his way, its then that he begins doing whatever, and I mean whatever, is necessary to ensure his own rule is followed. 

King stated in an interview that he thought of Dubya when he was writing the character of Big Jim, but honestly, all I could think of was He Who Must Not Be Re-Elected... who gives a rip how it affects anyone, this is what I think is best, so this is the way we are doing it. 

Anyway, its a huge book, but I'd rank it up there as one of King's modern classics, and one I'll probably read again in the next year or two (it stays on my iPod just in case...)

41... Z's Serves the Burgers
Sometimes the best food you can find is in a nondescript hole in the wall place you've passed by a thousand times but never noticed its existence... and that would be Chris Z's to a tee. 

Nestled on a corner near St. Vincent's hospital, sharing the same block, if not the same wall, with the empty building that used to be Golden Rule BBQ (take a left off of Red Mt Expressway/Hwy 31 as you are facing St. Vincents), it doesn't have very much parking, and in fact, the best way to get to it is to drive past it, turn left at the light and come around the entire structure.

Walking in, you can see immediately that its family owned and operated... covering the walls in almost every space are frames, frames with single pictures of family, frames with duo photos of more family, large frames with collages of a dozen or more pictures of family and friends.  Being my close friend Melanie's husband, you'll see pictures of Melanie and Chris together.  You'll see the Z kids, Jay Z, Special K and The Zack Attack.  You'll see lots of people that sort of look like their family, and you'll see friends that you might recognize... or not.  

The cafe itself is set with not more than a dozen tables, mostly because there is no room.  Come at lunch time, you'll be hard pressed to find an open chair, but if you are an experienced Chris Z eater, you'll know this and will plan for it--either come earlier or later, or get it to go, or just stand and eat like many patrons do.

The menu is typed out in a familiar Comic Sans font, with some scribble with a marker and some tape over certain things, those manual corrections that the owner doesn't have time to make in the form of a new menu... no, there is too much food to make.  And the food is aplenty.

Hot dogs cooked to perfection, topped with everything or nothing at all, your request.  And the cheeseburgers are fantastic... my personal favorite is a Chris Z burger with mayo, mustard and ketchup, and cheese splashed all over the fries.  The Chris Z burger was actually recently named by a local magazine to the be the best burger in town, and its a well deserved distinction.

And then there is dessert... a family owned recipe for cheesecake pie.  That piece of pie kinda deserves its own ranking among the coolest things of the year, almost like a #40 1/2 spot... its amazing.  I've had cheesecake in six different states, ranging everywhere from the Carnegie Deli in Manhattan to the Baltimore Harbor... and its the best cheesecake I've ever had.

Anyway, if you are in the St. Vincents area, and you find yourself hungry--or even if you just want to find something new, check 'em out.  They also serve breakfast, which is excellent too... and that's not to mention their Middle Eastern menu they have the first Friday of every month.  Its good, good stuff.  (you can click here for more info)

Coming up... Hide yo' kids!  Hide yo' wife!  Its more of the best of 2010, now that 2011 is half over!  Yeah!  More Disney!  A DFC Champion!  And startin' fires...

The Summer of Blogging, Day Twenty Two

Forgiving Dad

Many readers of this blog know me really well, because they are close to me, and I "let them in", so to say, to that inner circle of myself that many people don't see--The Lovely Steph Leann, natch, but also a few people like MZ, Mikey, The Good Rever'n Ty, and a few select others.  Many more know me from Valleydale Church (an sbc fellowship), and just know my name or my face, or read the blog and keep up with me there.  And still more just know the name, and that I have a blog.  (to all of you, thanks for reading)...

Anyway, the ones that know me really well know that I'm dealing with the probability that I will lose my mom in a few weeks... months... who knows.  She's not doing well, and every time the phone rings, in those seconds it takes me to pick it up and see who is calling, my mind goes through an entire scenario of my sister calling, tell me the worst.  And so far, it hasn't been like that... its The Lovely Steph Leann asking about our upcoming Disney trip, or MZ asking me about picking up some white mocha, or Mikey calling me about a movie at the ghetto theater, or MZ asking me to pick up some grande cups, or... you get the point.  Its never my sister.  But one day, it will be.

And with the loss of my mom, the inevitable, I will have lost both of my parents.  I'm sure that will be a blog for another day. 

This past August marks 10 years since my father passed.  As the years rolls by, I remember him, but maybe a little less and less... not to say I'll forget John H. Dollar, but its like, your life keeps going.  You keep a little piece of him tucked away, your favorite parts, like when we used to do the "Question of the Day" (as a kid, I would write down a question like "Who painted the Mona Lisa?" or "How do airplanes stay in the air?", and he would write down a response later), or when he would take me to get my haircuts as a small kid.  I mostly forget the bad stuff, though I'm sure if I thought about it hard, I could come up with something--so I try not to worry about that too much.

John Dollar served in World War II, and in Korea as an airplane mechanic.  I've always had the utmost respect not just for veterans, especially in today's conflicts when war is unlike anything we've ever faced, but my feeling towards WWII guys (and gals) is quite simply, they saved the world.  Not everything was perfect, not everyone agreed, and our country then--like now--did some dumb stuff, but my father was part of a military that stopped an ever-growing movement of hatred and power, one that was taking country by country.   And I'm not even sure we'll ever be successful in such an endeavor again, not with today's culture and society.  Just sayin'.

They had a military funeral for my dad.  It was one of the most beautiful, powerful things I've ever seen--he was in the Air Force, and a group of Air Force soldiers performed the service, including one of the... well, I hate saying "coolest", but that's what it was... things I've ever seen, that being the flag folding.  Taps played.  A soldier got on one knee in front of my broken mom, and handed the flag to her, saying, "We present this flag to you on behalf of the Air Force, and the United States of America, and we thank him for his service to our country."   Then, a 21-gun salute.  Unbelievable. 

Today is Veteran's Day.  Usually, I save my patriotism for a July 4th post, and I always do something for 9/11, but I thought I would post something I wrote in 2000, discussing my father and myself. 

From September 1st, 2000....

My father and I have never had a perfect relationship. As a matter of fact, I've spent the last few years kind of harboring a slight grudge against the man. I know he loved me, he had to of to put up with me for 18 years but the problem was I never really heard it from him. I would always hear it from my mother "You know your dad loves you". Sure, he wasn't the kind of person who expressed it a whole lot in words, but in my mind, his actions never showed it either. He didn't come to my graduation or my Eagle Scout ceremony, along with a few other things that were really important to me, and for some reason, I used those as reasons to be a little bitter.

The last year or so, he's been from the nursing home to the hospital to the nursing home to the hospital, back and forth. Nothing specific, he was just getting older. And older and older. In the 18 months or so he's been away, I've probably seen him maybe five or six times. I think I subliminally used the distance from Birmingham to there as a reason not to go see him, when really it was I wasn't ready to forgive for anything. I've never had a problem with forgiveness, unless it had to do with my very own dad. Imagine that.

This past Monday, my sister calls me at work, and says those words I'd been expecting to hear for a while "You need to come home and see him. He's not doing so well." I had originally planned to take the Labor Day weekend and come see him, and thoughts of doing so still lingered, but I felt the Spirit prodding me "Go on. Its time."

Tuesday, I drove from Birmingham in my new-to-me Blazer and went straight to the nursing home. Once upon a time, my father stood 6'4, topped 220, big strong muscles, a beer in one hand, a remote in the other. Now, he lay curled up, looking about 130 or so, a blank look on his face. Not the man I remember growing up. Suddenly it occurred to me how wrong I had been to wait this long.

I think God had ordained my visit this particular day, because there was no one around. The distractions were gone. And my courage was there. I sat down beside the bed and began to speak. My first words were "Daddy... I forgive you." Not knowing, and still not knowing now, if he could even hear me, I began to tell him of the things I had harbored. The things I had held against him. Stuff that seemed probably stupid to the outside world, but stuff that was really important to me. He just stared at me. Not a sound, not a grumble. Just a slightly open mouth, and a gaze.

Then, I began to tell of the most important part. "Daddy... God loves you. More than you'll ever know, God loves you. And you can spend forever with him, all you have to do is be forgiven and you'll be saved." I used the same words over and over... "All you have to do is think it, not even say it. Forgive me, and save me." I said those words over and over, praying that he would hear me.

And, tonight, while I was at Bible Study, my father passed away. About 8:45 or so. I'm quite sad, actually, but I praise God that I talked to him. I can never say for sure... well, not until I reach Heaven myself... if he understood a word I was saying, but the main thing was that I said what needed to be said.

Now... here's your encouragement.... say it. Don’t hold grudges. Not to rehash the old Life is Short adage, but in a way, that’s right on the money. Don’t wait. Find those people you are angry with, find those people you have a misunderstanding with, and clear it up. The Bible commands us to not let the sun go down on our anger... and I waited many suns... almost too many.

Back to 2010, hope I didn't bring the mood down too much... thanks for reading...

The 100 Coolest Things of 2009... 40 thru 31

Welcome back!  We are slowly but surely making our way through the Coolest 100 Things of 2009... let's continue with #s 40 to 31...

The 40th Coolest Thing of 2009... "Sweet Thing" by Keith Urban
"When I picked you up for our first date baby, well your pretty blue eyes they were driving me crazy, and that tiny little thought they were so amazing they were looking at me.."



The above video is taken from a AOL Live Session... who even uses AOL anymore?  Anyway, its a great song... got a fever pitch, fast paced, and its the first single from Keith Urban's 5th album, "Defying Gravity".  The lyrics discuss "kissing on the porch swing" and having his woman "exit through the bedroom window while the whole world's sleeping"... of course, according to his Wiki, the lyrics were inspired by Urban's relationship with his Ford Mustang.   But hey, this is the 2000s... who are we to tell him who to love? 

The 39th Coolest Thing of 2009... "Taken"
What do you get when you put the smokin' hotness of Famke Janssen together with the good-lookedness of Maggie Grace, then pour in a heapin' helpin' of Liam Neeson as a bad mofo father who is hellbent on getting his daughter back, no matter what?

You get "Taken".  Liam Neeson plays Ben, a divorced guy who is just trying to get along with his daughter, and his ex-wife, and is forced to allow his daughter to go overseas.  When he gets a disturbing phone call from his daughter, who is then kidnapped, he becomes a Super Pimpdaddy and goes nuts on everyone to get her back.  Its one of those kind of "I hope that I would do as much for Lorelei Addison as he does for his kid" kind of films. 



"I don't know who you are.  I don't know what you want.  If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money.  But what I do have is a very particular set of skills... skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you."   YEAH!!!

The 38th Coolest Thing of 2009... "John Adams"
From June 5th of last year... ...I wanted to talk about "John Adams", the HBO Mini-series that The Lovely Steph Leann and I have been watching. We finished part 2 of 7, and already, its magnificent. Its just a wonderful piece of film thusfar, with Paul Giamatti as the title character doing a great job. It might just stolen out from under him, though, with Tom Wilkinson as Benjamin Franklin, who is hilarious and perfect at the same time. The big surprise? How much I love the character of Abigail Adams. I already dig on Laura Linney anyway, one of my favorite actresses, but her take on the strained and sacrificial wife of John Adams is nearly flawless.

Anyway, to follow up, we did finish it.  And it was amazing, from start to finish.  The miniseries is in 7 parts, and it takes you through the early days of Adams' political career, through his presidency and battles with fellow patriots, and through the end of his life.  Laura Linney is amazing, Paul Giamatti is solid and even the bit players, like That Guy David Morse as General, then President, Washington, are great.

Even though it is a Hollywood production (from HBO), its pretty much unbiased in its telling of the American founding and its founders.  Its remarkable to watch a group of men so passionate about what they believe to be right, so willing to give up everything they have for a country to be free of tyranny and rule from a land far away... and its important to remember that not everyone was for succession.  Not everyone wanted to be free--many people wanted to stay right where they were, under rule, as it was comfortable and predictable. 

I'll stop before I get on a rant, but here's some recommended reading from Rush Limbaugh Jr, the father of the talk show host.  Its called "Americans Who Risked Everything."  Yes we can!

The 37th Coolest Thing of 2009... The Video for "Fallin' For You" by Colbie Caillet
Here's what I wrote on October 29th, in a post called "Music and Magic"... 
Here's what I love about this video... its just fun. And sweet. And nice. She's pretty, he's a nerd, yet she totally digs him. Its like The Lovely Steph Leann falling for me all over again, only without the surfing and the trailer. And the ending of the video is just precious. Yep, I said precious



My 20th favorite video of the first decade of the century, and the 37th coolest thing of all last year.

The 36th Coolest Thing of 2009... Debating Brad Latta
Everyone needs an antithesis.  I'm not sure that Brad is mine, cause I am not really sure what my antithesis would even be, but perhaps he'll fit.

I believe what I believe, and I know why I believe it, but the good (and bad) thing about my friend Brad is he asks--nay, demands--that you know why you believe it.  "Gut feeling" doesn't work with this guy... being the lawyer that he is, he asks you give the facts.  Be it sources, facts, data, stats or whatever. 

Though we are mainly on the same page about most things, we do differ in many ways, and sometimes our late night Gmail or Facebook chats/debates/wars can be heated... probably the biggest battle was recently, when our Congress passed the healthcare bill, and He Who Must Not Be Re-Elected signed off on it (not that He Who Must Not Be Re-Elected actually knew what was in the bill... nor most of our other Congressmen, one of which stated that they didn't have time to read any of it... but another discussion for another day).

But at the end of the day, I think we both have a mutual respect for each other, he for my passion on what I believe, me for his challenging me (and others) to have a reason to believe it.   He thinks he's right and I'm wrong, I know I'm right and he's wrong, and we'll continue our banter up until and past the November election.  My hats off to you, Brad. 

The 35th Coolest Thing of 2009... This Picture
Taken at our few days in Walt Disney World, here's a snapshot of Amy McL, Tommy Mac, The Good Rev'rn Ty Sharpton Coffey and Yours Truly...

This picture cracks me up every single time I look at it.

The 34th Coolest Thing of 2009... "Star Trek"
From the Clouds review on May 7th, 2009:

I loved this movie. I loved how it started, I loved the story, I loved the effects, I loved how it ended, I just thought this flick was absolutely worth the wait and just awesome. I really enjoyed how JJ Abrams didn't take the movie soooo seriously... there are a lot of Trek fans out there, so he had to walk a fine line between telling a story that people who aren't necessarily Trekkies will enjoy and want to see, and not angering or upsetting those very Trekkies who, despite the fact some of them have never kissed a girl (by the way, I looked for that Shatner SNL skit, and couldn't find it anywhere...), have basically kept the franchise alive for forty years.

Abrams does a great job at walking that line... I think anyone who isn't familiar with Star Trek will just enjoy a good science fiction story, and anyone who knows the story will recognize some of the little salutes to the original that have found its way into the film. The officer who goes with Sulu and Kirk down to the alien planet--you know he's not coming back. We know this because we've seen the show. Bones yelling, "Dammit, I'm a doctor!" and Scotty yelling, "We're giving it all she's got cap-pin!" were lines that I cracked up on, as did many other people in the theater. Even the Kobayashi Maru training scene is a throwback to the original cast, and there's a slight shout-out to the interracial barrier broken by the original series (when Kirk and Uhura kissed on television. Gasp.)

Anyway, I can highly recommend this film to anyone who's ever had a remote interest in Star Trek, be it the Original Series, or the Next Generation, or Deep Space Nine or Voyager or Enterprise or Tribbletown or Space Babylon or Battleship Starlactica or whatever they've called the 87 spin off shoes... for any die-hard Trekkies, loosen up a little. JJ Abrams made his film in love. Its great.

The 33rd Coolest Thing of 2009... PTI

Most mornings, I shower with Michael Wilbon and Tony Kornhieser.  Okay, not actually with Wilbon and TK, but I download the podcast every day, and on mornings when The Lovely Steph Leann is not around when its showertime, ESPN's "Pardon the Interruption" is on my iPod.

Its an irreverent sports talk show that has two hosts--usually Wilbon and TK, but sometimes sportswriters Dan LeBatard or Bob Ryan or a few others jumps in to substitute.  Usually they go through the big sports topics of the day, including doing various segments with titles like "Oddsmakers" and "Email" and "Role Play" (which cracks me up).  Its remarkable, though... I've never actually seen a full episode of the show.  I actually try not to watch it when its on TV, because I know I'll be listening to it on the iPod the next day. 

The 32nd Coolest Thing of 2009... "Avatar"
I did my Clouds review on January 4th, 2010, but I did see the movie in 2009... and here's a summary of that review:

"Avatar" was the absolute best use of 3-D I've ever seen in my complete, whole, entire life. The spectacle, the color and the use of 3-D was marvelous, the depth of the picture was unlike anything I'd ever seen. The movie simply comes alive as the picture goes on, and while you forget you are even watching it in 3-D, somehow you know it wouldn't be the same in 2-D.

The story was average. I mean, it was a good story, it wasn't boring, a few people died that you didn't expect to die, but you kinda knew how the ending would end. The acting is average, no one really jumps out, though I will admit that both Sam Worthington and Zoe Saldana do a stellar job all dressed in the blue of the Na'vi.

By and large, "Avatar" is a magnificent film, if only for what your eyes will feast upon in every second. And to see it, do it justice and see it in 3-D. Don't wait for the dollar theater or do the "I'll see it on DVD" or catch a 2D show... this is a movie you just simply need to see in 3-D to understand. And to fully appreciate.

And now that its been a few months since I've seen it, I look forward to seeing it again, to see if I still feel the same about it.  It lost the big prize at the Academy Awards to "The Hurt Locker", and I'm curious to see, after all the hype and the fact that its now the biggest movie in American film history, does it still hold up? 

The 31st Coolest Thing of 2009... Ruminations
There was an email that went around that caught everyone's attention, and made me laugh so hard, I posted it in September.  It had hilarious little bites like "I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die." and "Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the “people you may know” feature on Facebook people that I do in fact know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with?"

Well, Krista, fellow coffee drinker, informed me that the site belonged to comedian Aaron Karo, and the site was called "Ruminations".  And its awesome.  Its now a site I check three or four times a week, sometimes daily, depending on how busy I am.   Saying then, "I will tell you that the site itself is not a bad site... it does have some Not Emmy Turnbow Safe language, but its very rarely anything than just worldy conversation, nothing dirty. Now, I could tell you to go on over to that site and have fun reading, and you might do that, but let's be real... I want you to stay here. Heck, I'm about half-a-thousand away from 30K, so I'd like to keep you on this very site..."  Proud to say I'm about two half-a-thousands away from 40K now, so there!

Anyway, to end this, I'd like to give you some recent ruminations, including some I wrote (and were published):

**Only two things become important when stuck in traffic: a full tank and an empty bladder.

**Getting into a heated political debate with a casual acquaintance on Facebook is a great way to make things really awkward the next time you actually see each other

**When I drop my food, it isn't about how many seconds it was on the ground. It's about who's around me to see me pick it up and eat it.

**Hey customer service call center... at what point does your "higher call volume than normal" actually become normal enough that you will hire more people and not make me wait 40 minutes to talk to you?

**The fact that the recommendations for me in the my iTunes store include Debbie Gibson, the cast of High School Musical AND Nirvana makes me wonder who I even am anymore

**I'll go to great lengths to scavenge other devices for batteries, long before I'll even consider going out to actually buy new ones.

**How do I not know you, if we have more than 100 friends in common on facebook?

**A college diploma is just a big fancy receipt

**Maybe I need to set my alarm clock to go off before I go to bed and shut it off. This seems to be the only way I can fall fast asleep

**Some songs are impossible to describe over the Internet. Like that one that goes ooohh oh oooohhooh ooohh oh oooohhhooo ouoo

Alright... 30 to go before the Coolest Thing of 2009 is announced.  If I'm lucky, I'll get to that before I give you the 100th coolest thing of 2010....  coming up... The Tucks... MZ & Starbucks... and later, a Barnett meal that sucks.  Went with the rhyme scheme.

The 100 Coolest Things of 2009... 50 to 41

First of all, thank you to everyone who has been visiting here either daily or at least every few days... I know for those of you who could care less about Idol--and let's face it, there hasn't been a lot to care about this season--its rather boring when all you see is idle Idol chatter when you come here looking for Happy Times stories, maybe a movie review, or even a mention or two of He Who Must Not Be Re-Elected's last week or so...  so, thank you.

Secondly... why aren't you a fan on Facebook, eh?  If you are reading this on Facebook, you need to go to Clouds to see any video that might be on the site, then search "Clouds in My Coffee" on Facebook and become a fan.  Its the right thing, nay, the cool thing to do. 

Third, we still aren't done with 2009 yet!  In case you missed it (and since I haven't done one of these in a month, you might have!), here's where we've been thusfar:

The 100th to 91st Coolest Things of 2009
The 90th to 81st Coolest Things of 2009
The 80th to 71st Coolest Things of 2009
The 70th to 61st Coolest Things of 2009
The 60th to 51st Coolest Things of 2009

And here we go with the next ten...

The 50th Coolest Thing of 2009... "Right Round" by Flo Rida
Yes, yes, I know the song is a few years old, and yes, I'd heard it before... but I'd never really taken to it until this year.  This year?  It's kinda catchy.  Silly, a little corny, somewhat stupid, partly annoying and all from a guy who's name is taken from a state with a space in between (I'm guessing "Ken Tucky" and "Oak LaHoma" were on the list.  What about Gior Juh?  Ha!  I got at least 46 more of these), but its use of the term "Benja-min Frank-ah-lins" alone makes me laugh.  Its a good work out song.  Not that I work out, but if I did...

The 49th Coolest Thing of 2009... "Mother Lover"
Well, this is a family show.  I keep it Rated PG, every now and again delving into a PG-13 territory, but for the most part, I keep it clean.  So, for this spot, I won't bother linking to it, I won't put up pictures, I won't do anything but give a nod to K-Dub and then say four words:

1) Mother
2) Lover
3) Timberlake
4) Hysterical

The 48th Coolest Thing of 2009... "The Rise and Fall of the WCW"

When I found out this video was coming out, I almost peed myself.  I was so friggin' excited, as I remember vividly the fabled "Monday Night Wars"--that being the battle between WWE on USA Network and World Championship Wrestling on Turner owned TBS.  I was a huge, huge WCW an, having watched it since 1986 or 87 as a kid, when it was called NWA (National Wrestling Alliance", a few years before WCW).

Anyway, I've always been fascinated by the downfall of the WCW in the late 90s, not just as a wrestling fan, but just from a business prospective.  You know how when someone gets straight zeroes in college (knew a guy) and you say, "Man, he had to work to fail that badly..."?  Well the guys running the WCW seriously had to work to fail this miserably.  This was chronicled in my pick for the 18th Coolest Thing of 2006, the book called "The Death of the WCW", and the DVD here is along the same lines.

Its a 3 Disc collection, with two discs devoted to classic WCW matches including stuff like Ric Flair vs. Magnum T.A. from 1985, the classic Flair vs Steamboat Chi-Town Rumble match from 1989, one of Sting's first matches, that being against Big Van Vader from 1992's Great American Bash, the unintentionally funny Bash at the Beach from 1998 with Diamond Dallas Page and Karl Malone against Hollywood Hogan and Dennis Rodman, a huge War Games match in 1996 with Sting, Lex Luger, Flair, Arn Anderson, Hollywood Hogan, Kevin Nash, Scott Hall and nWo fake Sting.  Yeah, exactly.

Oh, and its got a match from 1998's Halloween Havoc between Diamond Dallas Page and one of my favorite wrestlers ever, Goldberg.  Goldberg absolutely ruled.  Page lost the match after getting hit with a spear AND a jackhammer. 


How 'bout that's Michael Buffer ("leeet's get reeeeeeady to ruuuuuuumbuuuuulllll") in the ring, and Tony Schivione on announcing duties.  Awesome.  By the way, I wanted to do that entrance at my wedding, the one where Goldberg comes out to pyro, and the smoke, and I yell, breath out the smoke, throw the punches and slap myself in the head.  The Lovely Steph Leann said no.  Party pooper.

But the real gem on this disc is the documentary that follows the origins of the WCW, from the beginning with Jim Crockett Promotions to the infamous "Black Saturday".  It took off when Hulk Hogan joined, turning heel (bad guy) for the first time in his career, and the fact that one of the chapters on the DVD menu is titled 'Mistakes Begin', followed by "Vince Russo" says it all.  If there is to be any criticism, it would be on the matches themselves... there should have been a little more surrounding each match, perhaps teh lead up to, and the aftermath, not just from bell-ring to pinfall.  And really, did we need to see a match between Lance Storm and Booker T?  To emphasize how badly things were going for the WCW, they took Booker T, a great wrestler and renamed him "GI Bro".  No kidding.

Great DVD. 

The 47th Coolest Thing of 2009... Lunch With...
It was a good year for reunions.  Lunch with Stan McDuffie in the spring of 2009 was great.  We graduated together, and hadn't seen the guy since the Samson High reunion of 2002.  We met at a BBQ joint in Homewood, and just shared life stories, our pain of what had then-recently happened in Samson and more.  It was awesome.

Not to long after that, I met up with Drew Roe, a fraternity brother of mine who also lives here in town.  That's the crazy thing about Birmingham... I share a city with so many people that I would love to see more of, but never do.  Anyway, we had some lunch, caught up, laughed, did some reminiscing, and had a good time.  Promised each other we'd do it again, and hopefully we will.

Met The Official Clouds In My Coffee High School Crush Julie Wise for dinner last April, and that was an absolute hoot.   Met up with Barrow, one of the coolest guys I've ever met, and the perfect name for one of my characters in the book I might eventually write.  Saw The Official Clouds In My Coffee Troy State Crush Tiffany Abbott at a Chick-fila.  Met with both Dayla Ellison and Rebecca Jourdan Samuelson (we'll get to her later) over lunch, two dear, dear friends that I was so excited to see again. 

This Spring's goal?  To have lunch or dinner with Chris McCall.  I'm planning on heading home for a day or two at the end of April, when The Happiest Place in the Mall is finally The Emptiest Place in the Mall, and I'm going to make it a point to find this guy. 

The 46th Coolest Thing of 2009... "The Princess & the Frog"
There's not much more I could add to what I felt about this movie when I wrote about it in December 2009, so here's some thoughts from that post...

Plot in a nutshell, its a Disney twist on the story of The Frog Prince, the story that has a girl kissing a frog who turns into a handsome prince. In this tale, however, Naveen, the handsome prince, has been turned into a frog by the voo-doo man, Dr. Facilier, and when he convinced our heroine Tiana to kiss him, she turns into a frog herself. Hijinx, hilarity and romance ensue as they, along with Ray the Cajun Firefly and Louis the jazz playing crocodile, try to find Mama Odie to help them turn back into humans again.



The animation is stunning. The film is beautifully drawn, and to its credit, its done so much so that there's no way this film could have been a computer animated feature--it would have lost most, if not all, of its charm. Tiana is a heroine who is working hard for her dreams to happen, not waiting around for someday, her prince will come, and that is to be admired. Much has been made about Tiana being the "first black princess", and yes, that's true, but this film definately takes liberties with history--she's best friends with a rich debutante named Charlotte, which alone is an impractical thought in the time period this film is set in. I didn't get caught up in that, though, and you shouldn't either.


One thing to be aware of when watching this film... you are witnessing the birth of a classic. This is a movie that, no matter how successful it will end up--and it will end up successful--that Campbell Isaiah and Lorelei Addison will watch, and their children will watch as well in 2040 on whatever home video format we're up to then. This is a movie that will be released in Blu-Ray and DVD in April of 2010, and will disappear into The Vault in June of 2011 or so, not to be available for 7 to 10 years.


This is the birth of a true Disney Princess, one that we'll be seeing with the likes of Cinderella, Belle, Ariel and Aurora for a long, long time. The last time we saw a true Disney Princess emerge? Mulan. The last time we saw a true Disney classic not-named-Pixar unfold before our eyes? Yep. "The Lion King". That was the last movie heralded and beloved enough to go into The Vault (well, "Fantasia 2000" also is in The Vault, coupled with "Fantasia", but that's kinda another story)... For me, and perhaps I'm the odd case, this is exciting. I'm thrilled that Disney has finally broken through the ceiling they put on themselves with "Dinosaur" and "Brother Bear".

The 45th Coolest Thing of 2009... JT Wins Survivor

Someone sent me a message last year and said, "Hey, so there's a guy from Samson on Survivor.  Do you know him?"  Up until then, the only notoriety Samson had recieved was the terrible massacre from... well, I'm not going to say his name, he doesn't deserve a mention.  So I did some checking up on Survivor, and what do you know, James Thomas was going to be on the show... James, the little brother of Tammy Thomas, who was a friend of mine in high school and who graduated with me, the same Tammy who scolded me for not snatching up this pretty girl named Stephanie, my friend, who I had brought with me to the 10 year reunion. 

And with the country accent, the sly look and the aww-shucks personality, what the heck--JT won the whole shebang.  Seriously.  Like, holy crap, the kid in whatever elementary school grade when I was a senior won a million bucks on Survivor.  I have his picture in my yearbooks! 

Anyway, it was a fantastic season of Survivor, and I'm excited that JT is on the equally as stellar current season, the Heroes vs Villians Survivor.  And if he wins, or comes close to winning, I'm already planning on going to Samson for the Survivor party this year. 

The 44th Coolest Thing of 2009... "Party in the USA"
Oh shut up. 

The 43th Coolest Thing of 2009... "The Blind Side"
Just like "The Proposal", this is a movie that the more I thought about it, the more I liked it.  I thought "The Blind Side" was great when I walked out of the theater, and somewhere down deep, I knew iI was going to like it more and more as time when on.

Here's what I said in December of 2009 when I reviewed it for the first time:

Its full of laughs and heartwarming moments, but its never preachy or manipulative. The movie's intent it never to make you feel like you have to cry, and it doesn't seem like its showing you the "Hallmark" moments just for the awwwww factor... its part of the story. In movies with this "helping each other out" theme, there's always an uncomfortable moment when the kids hate the new person, only to have this togetherness scene that brings them together--"The Blind Side" never has that. SJ and Collins are nothing but loving and supportive of Michael, and it even enhances Michael's rebuilding of his life.

The movie is excellent... its feel good, its warm, its funny, its everything a family movie should be, one that pokes at you to say "awwww" without demanding you tear up or feel sympathy and guilt. After the movie was over, I leaned over to The Lovely Steph Leann, and in my most politically incorrect tone said, "We should go to Ensley and adopt a black child." She frowned at me, then rolled her eyes and got up to leave. She's good at that.

The 42st Coolest Thing of 2009... Walt Disney World with Ty & The McLeods

Talk about a whirlwind trip... I had a few days on my own, as The Lovely Steph Leann was out of town.  I thought, hey, why not go to Disney World?  The Lovely Steph Leann wasn't too keen on my going all alone, so I recruited The Honorable Rev'rn Ty Sharpton and Tommy Mc and Amy McL to come with (that's us, there, after being soaked in the Backlot Tour)

We left midday, got there at something like 1am, checked in, slept for just a little while, spent the full day at Animal Kingdom, Hollywood Studios and Epcot, then the next day, walked around Downtown Disney before coming back.  Wow it was fast.  And tons of fun, because Disney is always better with friends.

The 41nd Coolest Thing of 2009... New Shoes
Shoes are those things that you use, but don't realize how good they can be until you find a pair that fits you exactly right.  Thus, this:

During our trip to The Most Magical Place on Earth in June, my feet were getting blistered. The Lovely Steph Leann chalked it up to my Lugz that, while comfortable, were just not made for the walking, standing, running and walking more that we were doing for 14 hours per day, four days in a row--the Skecher tennis shoes weren't doing any better. After watching her to go New Balance and spend over a $110 on a pair of shoes (which, all these years in marriage later is almost still unfathomable), I decided it was finally time to get myself a good pair of sneakers. We discussed it, and, still coming to grips about the fact that I might have to spend that much to fit my wide feet into some comfy shoes, I went to a local shop called The Trak Shak.


The guy there wasn't old... but he knew how to size a foot. I told him what I was looking for--a pair of tennis shoes that could be used for three things--running, walking and if needed, playing tennis, if I ever decided to get my chunky tail up and do something. I told him that my problem was my feet were wide, and it was hard to find a good pair of shoes that I liked. He listened, he asked me to walk around and he told me that he could tell from my walk that I tended to walk inward, probably due to lack of good footwear. Long story short (too late?) I came out with a pair of Nikes that fit... perfectly. What size? 9 1/2. I call them my Trailer Shoes. Why? Cause they are "Double wide".


The whole story can be found here.

Up next... A "Sweet Thing"... Going where no man, save for over a dozen movies and at least three TV shows, have gone before... and later, more Disney... and even more Disney...

The Encouragement Beginning

Way back in the day, I used to write stuff called "Dave's Random Emails of Encouragement". From 1999 to 2002, I wrote well over 100 essays, stories and short pieces about... well, things that happened in my life that gave me encouragement, and I wanted to pass those things along to other people. In its heyday, I had 125+ people on my email list, and over the course of those years, I would get tons of responses from people telling me they understood, or they felt the same way, or they needed to hear it, and yes, the occasional "dude... shut up."

I even semi-published... well, not really published, but printed out, gave small intros to each one, and put them in a 3 volume set that I gave copies to to a few people (I think McQ got a set, but beyond that, I have no clue).

Here's what I wrote at the beginning of Volume One:

There was Allyson Guy, Amy Alexander, Amy Valdmanis and Amy Worthy. There was Beth Sentell, Daina Richards, Hillary Kelly and Rebecca Glassco. There was Lara Smith, Mary Ann Crittenden, Misty Estes, Nathan Tutor, Shelby Logan, Stephanie Nipp, Sybil Johnson and Tad Roose. There was Tom Johnson, Ty Coffey, Wendy Brobst, Sharon Dobbins, Julie Haynes, Meredith Brazzell and Melanie Jackson. Kay Nichols. Jeff Herring. Chris Fulaytar. Alyssa Guy. Season Chappell. Amy Wible. They were there in the beginning.

September 1999, I wrote up an email called “Stephen”, because I had heard a guy by the name of EJ Smith speak at this Bible Study I had been attending for about two months at this lady named Sybil Johnson’s house. I thought EJ’s lesson was cool, and I wanted to share it with some of my friends. I got lots of response to it, and a few weeks later, I wrote another essay and mailed it out, adding a few more names to the email list upon request. So, from then, every time I went to a Bible Study, retreat, conference, Church service, or if God just taught me something cool, I began to share it over email. The first several emails were adapted from other essays, I just transferred the message from the original author to you, but as God began to mature me in Him, suddenly I found my own words... well, words inspired from God, not from other authors. I used other works to base my essays on, particularly songs, but I love to do my own personal take on the meaning of those songs.

Where is all this going? Well, I figure if I've got a blogsite, and its my words and writing, what a great way to share--actually, in September of 2005, when I was still unsure of what I was even doing (and sometimes I still don't know... ha!) I posted the first Email of Encouragement I'd ever written, as mentioned above.

Now, after all this time, I think its time to post them again, to let you, the Coffee Drinkers, read them, or re-read them, and maybe get a little encouragement of your own.

The Shawstavia Redemption

Where are we? Currently, sitting in the back of a police cruiser, handcuffed, in April of 2003. Find out how I got there by reading Part I.

As I sat down to finish the story, The Lovely Steph Leann was headed upstairs to lay that pretty little head to sleep. I mentioned that I had to finish my blog story, which she had not read yet. She asked which story, I told her it was the 2003 arrest, and she rolled her eyes. "I cannot believe you are telling that story." Then she disappeared upstairs.

Back to the story...

The Ford Explorer slowed down as it past the motel parking lot. I watched it turn right onto Highway 31, disappear for a few seconds, then reappear in the shopping center parking lot. I could see in the windows a very confused looking Wookiee behind the wheel, with Mikey and Tom and Shawn with him. The Explorer pulled to the front of the motel, almost looking like they were checking in.

My wrists were a little pained, by the way. Officer Tennessee Titan running back Eddie George had slapped on the handcuffs a little tight, so when Eddie George came back to the car, I asked if he would loosen them a little. I leaned over with my hands out, he obliged, uncuffed and then re-locked them.

Eddie George then turned around to see none other than Deucemate Tom Johnson headed walking towards them. They conversed for a minute or so, apparently with Tom asking permission to take my car back to The Deuce, which was denied, and then asking some questions about my situation... my best guess some years later would be him asking first, "Why is my roommate handcuffed in the back seat of a police car?"

This is different from the question Mikey would have asked, which would be, "Is he going to be deported, and if so, can I get him to sign his rent check real quick?"

Tom came over to the police car, under the watchful eye of Eddie George, looked in the window with a grin and said, "Hey d$." I nodded, "'sup Tom?"

We then chatted for a moment about the weather, about the prospects of Auburn and Alabama this coming fall, the possibility of you know, posting bail and I'm sure Tom made some remark about the soap being dropped and how that was a bad idea.

With Eddie George's permission, Tom was able to go to my car and pull out my debit card. I told Tom to go get about $200 cash out of my account, gave him my pin number, asked him to call Starbucks to let them know I've been delayed (re: detained) and sent him on his way.

About this time, with the fresh smell of bacon in the air, the Vestavia Hill Popo showed up. An old, gruff officer got out, had some words with Eddie George, and just like that, Officer Tennessee Titan running back Eddie George opened the back car door, asked me to step out, and then turned me over to Officer Grumpsalot. Without a word, Officer Grumpsalot opened the back door to his Vestavia Hills Police Cruiser and motioned me inside, which I did with little reaction.

He got behind the wheel, then began the drive up the hill to the Vestavia Hills Police Department. Unlike Eddie George, Officer Grumpsalot didn't say anything. He actually lowered his window about an inch or so, and lit up a smoke. Part of me was bothered by this, because really, I didn't pay a speeding ticket, and had an expired tag... sure that was wrong, and yeah, I need to pay some fines and such, but here I was, sitting in the back of a police car and now the Officer who isn't likely to win any congeniality awards is inhaling a cig, with smoke wafting back to me. There was a cage between us, not glass.

However, another part of me was quite amused by this. I don't feel sorry for anyone in the back of a police car, because whether the punishment fits the crime, the law is what it is, and here's an old school police officer lighting up a Marlboro, and I'm sure if I had said anything about it, he probably would have not only told me where to stick it, whatever "it" might be, he might tell me to go perform bad things on my own accord. So I kept quiet, slowly developing second hand cancer from the ride to the station.

I sighed and half-smiled as we passed Starbucks, the same one that I was supposed to be working at, by now a good 30 minutes. Keep in mind, I'm still wearing my Starbucks hat and my red shirt... and several of the officers frequent this Starbucks. Unfortunately, Eddie George nor Officer Grumpsalot were one of those.

We pulled into the station, he got out, pulled me out and led me inside, through a small lobby and into the booking room. That's right, I said "booking room". I could see the camera set up at the far end, and in the next room, a small counter with a few pads of black ink--fingerprinting. Beyond that, a small doorless entry way leading to what I glimpsed and could only guess to be... jail cells. Two of them, one on each side.

Another man, a tall, heavyset guy who looks like he'd be completely comfortable sitting 1) on a Harley hog and 2) at a buffet, was getting his mugshot taken. Officer Grumpsalot uncuffed me, handed me over to a nice older lady who could have passed for my grandmother, were she not wearing a police uniform and about to take my mug shot. She instructed me to stand in front of the camera, and hold a small black board.

The black board read, in removable tile letters "D-A-V-I-D D-O-L-L-A-R", and had a series of numbers under it. I held it, faced the camera, and it flashed. "Turn to the side, sweetie," she instructed, as if she were offering me a glass of tea to go with my cookies. I turned, held the sign beside me and the camera flashed again.

She led me over to the fingerprinting area, where Philo Beddoe the Biker was standing. She told me to just have a seat until Philo was done. I sat, sighing, leaning back in the chair. Really, I could have been upset... but why? It is what it is. I messed up, I was careless, and I got caught. I honestly found the entire episode more funny than anything else, though I was little worried about missing my shift at Starbucks, and there still was the issue of The Girlfriend Steph Leann, though by now, I had decided to just not tell her.

As I sat, a few of the police officers that I recognized walked in. One, who we called Officer Spill due to his propensity for knocking over drinks on our Starbucks counter (he'd done it twice by this time), saw me, looked bewildered, then smiled. "Well, guess we had better be careful that you don't spit in our drinks, huh?" I smiled back, thinking to myself, "Yep, and you no longer are going to receive quality drinks from my hand."

Remember that scene in "Con Air", when Cyrus the Virus asks Guard Falzon, "Oh, stewardess? Stewardess? What's the in-flight movie today?" and Guard Falzon says,"Well, I think you'll like it, Cyrus. It's called "I'll Never Make Love to a Woman on the Beach Again", and it's preceded by the award-winning short, "No More Steak for Me, Ever". He laughs and walks away, and Cyrus the Virus throws out a fake laugh before saying, "Funny f($**@+, aren't ya?"

I felt like that.

Philo Beddoe was done with his fingerprinting, and the officer led him into the small adjacent room. I heard the groan, followed a few seconds later by the clanging of a jail cell door closing. I was led to the fingerprinting counter, and the older lady with me gently took my left hand, then put my index finger on the ink pad. She rolled it onto the black ink, then moved it over to a large card.

My finger was placed and rolled on a square marked "Left Index". A few seconds later, the square marked "Left Middle" was marred by a black fingerprint, followed by the ring, the pinky, then the thumb.

Philo Beddoe, from inside his cell, called out, "Can I call my brother again?" One of the officers responded, "Yeah, just give me a minute and I'll get you the phone." I asked, "What are you in for?" and Philo Beddoe responded, "Funny thing, really. I got a speeding ticket about five years ago, right before I was moving to Florida. Forgot that I got it. I haven't been back to Birmingham in five years, and I came this weekend to see my parents. Got pulled over for some routine traffic stop, and here I am. What about you?"

"Dude, that sucks. Yeah, kinda the same. Got a ticket I forgot to pay, so here I am."

"Tell you one thing, man. When my brother gets here and gets me out, I ain't never coming back to Birmingham again. That's for dang sure."

I looked at the officer who was finishing up inking and rolling my right hand and asked, "Am I going to be in the jail cell?"

She nodded and said, "Yes."

What was jail like, you ask? Well, all I can say is, the first night's the toughest, no doubt about it. They march you in naked as the day you were born, skin burning and half blind from that delousing crap they throw on you, and when they put you in that cell, when those bars slam home, that's when you know it's for real. Old life blown away in the blink of an eye. Nothing left but all the time in the world to think about it. Most new fish come close to madness the first night. Somebody always breaks down crying. Happens every time. The only question is, who's it gonna be? I remember my first night. Seems like a long time ago.

Fortunately for me, The Deuce saved the day. A police officer came in and saw me, red shirt, black Starbucks hat, black inked fingers and nodded. "Your d$, right?" I nodded. "You got an entourage out here."

I followed him out into the main lobby, and there stood Mikey, Shawn, the honorable Rev'rn Ty, Tom, Wookiee and my buddy Demastus, Atty at Law, and as I walked in, the applauded. I nodded my head, smiled, and bowed.

"So, uh... can I get a ride to work?" I asked into the crowd.

The aftermath started by getting my car out of impound, which cost me about $110. I had to pay my fines, which strangely enough wasn't as much as I thought. Because I had such an old speeding ticket, my license was suspended unbeknownst to me. So when I was stopped, it was taken from me, and I was given a "driving with a suspended license" fine, in addition to my expired tag fine, and of course, the cost of the original ticket. However, I paid $155 the night I was sprung from prison, and subsequently, that was it. I called later, and was told that it was now paid up with my previous payment.

To this day, I'm not sure if the $155 I paid was for the tag, the license or the ticket, or maybe it was discounted because I'm a member in good standing of The Deuce, and truly, The Deuce Abides.

Now... The Girlfriend Steph Leann was another story. I went on to work, and caught much ribbing from the fellow baristas about being a convicted felon in their midst. Bummed a ride home, and the next morning, I got a phone call. It was Stephanie.

"Hey baby, how are ya?" she asked.
"I'm great," I responded. I had gone back and forth on whether to tell her or not, and had decided that I would just keep quiet, for now. Perhaps one day, when we were married, sitting on our front porch just covered in grandchildren and saying things like "No!" and "Stop that!", I would pipe up and say, "Hey, let me tell you a funny story about a time before we were engaged."

I never had that chance.

"So how was your night last night? Anything in particular you want to tell me?" she asked. She knew. Somehow, some way, she knew.
"Nothing really. Worked. Came home."
"Was ARRESTED?!?!?!"
"Well, yeah, that too."
"Yeah, Ty called me last night. I was eating dinner with my parents, and got this phone call, and had to fake it with them like it was nothing. YOU'D BETTER BE GLAD YOU DIDN'T CALL ME, OR I WOULD HAVE LEFT YOUR (@**# A#($** IN JAIL!!!" (she didn't really say curse words or use punctuation in her comments, but it was rather strong). To this day she still contends that she would have left me there. And to this day, I still remember that Rev'rn Ty sold me out.

All these years later, the whole thing still resonates. Sometimes people ask me if I'm rehabilitated. Well, there's not a day goes by I don't feel regret. Not because I was in jail, or because you think I should be. I look back on the way I was then: a young, stupid kid who committed that terrible crime. I want to talk to him. I want to try and talk some sense to him, tell him the way things are. But I can't. That kid's long gone and this old man is all that's left. I got to live with that. Rehabilitated? It's just a crap word. So you go on and make your judgements, sonny, and stop wasting my time. Because to tell you the truth, I don't give a rip.

So there it is. The story that was never told has now been told. Perhaps Mikey, Tom, Wookiee, Shawn-Fu, Ty and The Lovely Steph Leann will remember it differently, but that's how it happened in my mind. Hope you enjoyed my tale of lawlessness, reckless abandon and appreciate the fact I left out the gangster wars and rape from my time in the joint.

Thank you again for reading the blog, and here's to the next 500 posts, to getting to 50,000 hits in the next two years and I'll have you to thank for it all. You guys rock.